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Added by Aira on 28 Sep 2010 08:51
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Weird Translations... by sections

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If...

Ok, it's already weird, but it's a verse of "Eloisa to Abelard" by Alexander Pope. I guess the Italian translation of this poetry was too "cultural", so they chose a simple (and horrible) title explaining the plot:

Se mi lasci ti cancello

If you leave me I erase you

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People who added this item 51 Average listal rating (30 ratings) 5.2 IMDB Rating 5.3
No comment.

Se ti investo mi sposi?

If I run you over will you marry me?


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People who added this item 1823 Average listal rating (1075 ratings) 5.3 IMDB Rating 5.5
Runaway Bride (1999)

Se scappi ti sposo

If you run away I marry you


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People who added this item 5 Average listal rating (3 ratings) 7 IMDB Rating 4.7

Se scappi ti trovo

If you run away I find you

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People who added this item 24 Average listal rating (15 ratings) 5.7 IMDB Rating 5.8
Time Share (2000)

Se cucini ti sposo

If you cook I marry you

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People who added this item 21 Average listal rating (13 ratings) 7.7 IMDB Rating 6.6
Honky Tonk (1941)
Mmh... I don't know if men would like this one...

Se mi vuoi sposami

If you want me marry me

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People who added this item 127 Average listal rating (69 ratings) 4.4 IMDB Rating 5.4

Se mi guardi mi sciolgo

If you look at me I melt

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It's all about love

Some words are more attractive than others. And the most attractive word is surely "love"
This is one of the worst title translations. It gives the wrong idea of two people meeting by chance and fall in love, while the most important thing in this story is time circularity.

Un amore all'improvviso

A love on a sudden


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People who added this item 406 Average listal rating (263 ratings) 5.7 IMDB Rating 6.1
Larry Crowne (2011)
I think they liked the title above so much to copy it for a new movie. In fact, they only changed the article from indefinite to definite. This is pathetic.

L'amore all'improvviso

The love on a sudden


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People who added this item 2874 Average listal rating (1757 ratings) 7.5 IMDB Rating 7.9
I don't like this. They didn't care at all about Cash song "I walk the line" and its meaning, and chose:

Quando l'amore brucia l'anima

When love burns your soul

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People who added this item 632 Average listal rating (380 ratings) 5.7 IMDB Rating 5.6

La fontana dell'amore

The love fountain

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Tutta colpa dell'amore

It's all love's fault

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People who added this item 27 Average listal rating (11 ratings) 6.5 IMDB Rating 0

Amore in sciopero

Love on strike

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Un amore a 5 stelle

A 5-star Love


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People who added this item 301 Average listal rating (186 ratings) 5.6 IMDB Rating 6

In amore niente regole

No rules in love


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People who added this item 192 Average listal rating (109 ratings) 5.8 IMDB Rating 6.3
Noel (2004)

Un amore sotto l'albero

A love under the (Christmas) tree


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Un amore tutto suo

A love that's all her

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La voce dell'amore

Love's voice

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People who added this item 1304 Average listal rating (735 ratings) 5.6 IMDB Rating 5.7

Appuntamento con l'amore

Date with Love

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People who added this item 739 Average listal rating (451 ratings) 5.7 IMDB Rating 6.2

L'amore in gioco

Love into play

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Fantasma per amore

Ghost for love

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People who added this item 121 Average listal rating (62 ratings) 5.2 IMDB Rating 5.5

Parole d'amore

Love words

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People who added this item 328 Average listal rating (213 ratings) 6.4 IMDB Rating 6.7

Paura d'amare

Afraid to love

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People who added this item 47 Average listal rating (29 ratings) 5.3 IMDB Rating 6.1

Una strada, un amore

One street, one love

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Family portraits

People who added this item 6698 Average listal rating (4417 ratings) 6.7 IMDB Rating 7.5

Mamma, ho perso l'aereo

Mom, I missed the plane


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People who added this item 1763 Average listal rating (1089 ratings) 4 IMDB Rating 4.4

Mamma, ho preso il morbillo

Mom, I got the measles


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People who added this item 11 Average listal rating (6 ratings) 6.7 IMDB Rating 6.4
French original title: Le distrait

Che carriera che si fa con l'aiuto di mammà!

What a career advancing with mom's help!

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French original title: L'événement le plus important depuis que l'homme a marché sur la lune
(the most important event since man walked on the moon)

Niente di grave, suo marito è incinto

Nothing serious, your husband is pregnant

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People who added this item 56 Average listal rating (28 ratings) 6.6 IMDB Rating 6.1

Papà, sei una frana!

Dad, you're hopeless!


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Era mio padre

He was my father


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People who added this item 123 Average listal rating (82 ratings) 6.7 IMDB Rating 7.2
Avanti! (1972)

Che cosa è successo tra mio padre e tua madre?

What happened between my father and your mother?

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Ma papà ti manda sola?

But your daddy send you alone?

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People who added this item 251 Average listal rating (145 ratings) 5.2 IMDB Rating 5.1

Due padri di troppo

Two fathers too many


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Il mondo è pieno di papà

The world is full of dads

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Quando la moglie è in vacanza

When the wife is on vacation

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People who added this item 693 Average listal rating (407 ratings) 7 IMDB Rating 7.3

La moglie del soldato

The soldier's wife

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Don't!

Just a warning...

Non aprite quella porta

Don't open that door


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People who added this item 247 Average listal rating (167 ratings) 5.7 IMDB Rating 5.4

Non entrate in quella casa

Don't enter that house

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People who added this item 461 Average listal rating (324 ratings) 6.4 IMDB Rating 6.8
Don't worry if it doesn't make any sense in English.
It doesn't in Italian too.

Non guardarmi: non ti sento

Don't look at me: I can't hear you

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People who added this item 14 Average listal rating (2 ratings) 6 IMDB Rating 5.3

Non giocate con il catcus

Don't play with the cactus


Note: in Italian, cactus is used sometimes as a euphemism for a certain part of a man's body...
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People who added this item 121 Average listal rating (74 ratings) 5.9 IMDB Rating 5.5

Per piacere... non salvarmi più la vita

Please... don't save my life anymore

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People who added this item 608 Average listal rating (373 ratings) 7.3 IMDB Rating 7.7

Per favore, non toccate le vecchiette

Please, don't touch the old ladies

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Io non credo a nessuno

I don't believe in anybody

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People who added this item 60 Average listal rating (33 ratings) 6.7 IMDB Rating 6.5

Non rubare... se non è strettamente necessario

Don't steal... if it's not strictly necessary

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People who added this item 480 Average listal rating (274 ratings) 5.8 IMDB Rating 5.7

Non violentate Jennifer

Don't rape Jennifer

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Non mi scaricare

Don't dump me

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The more people, the better!

People who added this item 717 Average listal rating (417 ratings) 5.8 IMDB Rating 6.1
The Switch (2010)

Due cuori e una provetta

Two hearts and a test-tube

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People who added this item 64 Average listal rating (44 ratings) 7.2 IMDB Rating 7.2

Io e la vacca

Me and the cow


Note: in Italian "vacca" also means "wh*re"
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Fatti, strafatti e strafighe

(People) Got high, superhigh and superpus**es


Note: I hope my translation is not too vulgar but it's literal
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Lo sbirro, il boss e la bionda

The cop, the boss and the blonde

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Title translations may be necessary in some cases, but sometimes I wonder what the hell went on translator's mind making such horrible and ridiculos choices.
These are Italian titles.
Note: some translations in English are literal, so they could make no much sense.

This one is divided into sections:
- If...
- It's all about love
- Family portraits
- Don't!
- The more people, the better!
- Casting a shadow



WEIRD TRANSLATIONS... ENGLISH TO ENGLISH

WEIRD TRANSLATIONS... MISCELLANEOUS

You'll find other translations in:
MY FAVORITE TV SHOWS - CHILDHOOD
MY FAVORITE TV SHOWS - TEEN YEARS

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