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Added by GemLil on 8 Aug 2008 08:28
2887 Views 9 Comments
21
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Cinema's biggest Weasels

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Percy Wetmore

Wetmore only made it to the mile because he "knows big people". The nephew of the govs. wife, he takes pleasure in tormenting the prisoners awaiting the chair. An utter coward underneath it all, Wetmore violently asserts his power with threats of getting the others fired. Wetmore melts a man to death and kills the wing's 'circus mouse'. A right down badden.

Weasel Rating: 18

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People who added this item 2210 Average listal rating (1513 ratings) 6.5 IMDB Rating 7.2
Simon

The used car dealer who pretends to be an international spy to worm into women's beds. Immortalised as a weasel forever by the following quote:

"I'm actually a complete coward, if I ever saw a gun... Oh God, no, no don't kill me. I'm not a spy. I'm nothing. I'm nav-al-ent. I have to lie to women to get laid, and I don't score much. I got a little dick, it's pathetic. Wha, uh, oh God. Would a spy pee himself, huh?" "

Weasel Rating: 17

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People who added this item 4884 Average listal rating (3286 ratings) 6.5 IMDB Rating 7
Benny

Backstabber, sneak and completely selfish are among the first of the negative words to describe this Ermine. He deserved every beating and punishment he got because he was the biggest betrayer to ever walk the Earth.

Weasel Rating: 17
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People who added this item 4401 Average listal rating (2812 ratings) 7.3 IMDB Rating 7.6
The Duke

Maddened by lust for his whore, The Duke becomes jealous of Satine's affair and sends a goon to have Christian killed. The Duke spends his time in a perminant state of lust, he demands the play be rewritten to his ending and uses him money and goons to get everything he wants. He also looks like a weasel.

Weasel Rating: 11
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Dr. Chilton

Chilton spends his hours sleazing over FBI agent Clarice Starling, despite being knocked back. The doctor becomes jealous at the information Hannibel volentarily gives to her, over him. He initiates underhanded schemes to get the information he wants, and is thoroughly in the pocket of 'The Man'.

Weasel Rating: 11
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Tully Alford

Befriends the trusting Addams, uses information on the long lost Fester, to trick the family out of their gold.

Weasel Rating: 10
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Wormtail

Part of a team of undeniable legends, Wormtail leeches off of the personality of his 3 friends, only to betray the Potter's and frame Sirius. Too cowardly to fight with Voldamort, Wormtail spends his life in hiding, as a rat.

Weasel Rating: 10
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Gilbert Huph

Head of a corrupt insurance company and more concerned with profit than helping his customers. Huph does not allow Bob Parr to stop a guy from being mugged and fires him for helping the customers too much.

Weasel Rating: 10
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People who added this item 7893 Average listal rating (5098 ratings) 7.2 IMDB Rating 8.1
Donald Gennaro

The snivelly lawyer who is out for nothing but the money, Gennaro isn't awed by the beauty or magnificence of this scientific wonder, but the revenue it will bring in. When met with a hungry T-Rex Gennaro chooses to run and leave the screaming children, finally meeting his end crying on a toilet.

Weasel Rating:10
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Peter Ludlow

Ignoring the advice of all of the experts, Ludlow wishes to move all the dinosaurs from their natural habitat in Isla Sorna to a park in San Diego. The whole escapade of dinosaur evasion is done over again because of the money grabbing actions of Ludlow.

Weasel Rating: 10
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Grima Wormtongue

Working for Saruman, Wormtongue uses the power of manipulation and ear-whispering (aka Wormtonguing) to manipulate the actions of King Theoden, and weaken the Kingdom of Rohan.

Weasel Rating: 10
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People who added this item 4168 Average listal rating (2774 ratings) 7.7 IMDB Rating 8.2
Richard Thornburg

A greasey journalist who'll slither and sleaze his way into any story. Frequent blackmailer and squealer, he has nothing but weasel written into his genetics.

Weasel Rating: 10

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People who added this item 1126 Average listal rating (699 ratings) 5.5 IMDB Rating 5.6
Lucky Larry

"You don't just get the nickname Lucky Larry"

Gamber and Vegasite, Lucky Larry doesn't add much to the teams efforts, other than swigging booze and falling into pools of flaming fuel. Greasey hair and weasely features put this guy up here, although he makes no direct attempts to screw anyone over.

Weasel Rating 10
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Bogs Diamond/ The Sisters

Slithering around in the shadows and corridors of Shawshank prison. Bogs and the sisters make their way through all of the new and most vulnerable of prisoners.

"I wish I could tell you that Andy fought the good fight, and the Sisters let him be. I wish I could tell you that - but prison is no fairy-tale world.


Weasel Rating: 8
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The Plaza Hotel Staff

Mainly here because of Tim Curry's grin. The plaza hotel sneak about the hotel room, trying to uncover what Kevin is really up to. They finally discover his credit card fraud and smuggly hand him over to the police.

Weasel Rating: 8
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People who added this item 3332 Average listal rating (2292 ratings) 7.9 IMDB Rating 8.4
Carter Burke

A company man at heart. He knows nothing of honour, decency or loyalty. Would sell his entire group down the river for a chance at the big time.

Weasel Rating: 8
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Dr. Wren

A man of unethical morals creates a abomination in the pursuit of profit. Although this isn't said outright, his motives only make sense by his unscrupulous actions. Willing to fuck over anyone who gets in his way aswell as run away at the first sign of danger.

Weasel Rating: 7
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People who added this item 4755 Average listal rating (3124 ratings) 7.6 IMDB Rating 8.4
Prince Edward

The weak and effeminate son of Longshanks, who scorns his wife and uses his father's power to get what he wants, except the man he loves that is.

Weasel Rating: 7
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The Weasels

The menacing weasels pick on and frighten poor Moley, and later take over Toad Hall and run a muck..oh, and they are actual Weasels.

Weasel Rating: 7
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People who added this item 5327 Average listal rating (3515 ratings) 7.2 IMDB Rating 7.8
Walter Peck

A constant thorn in the side of the Ghostbusters crew. Ghosts and ghouls are left to create mayhem, while Peck shuts the team down with 'red tape'.

Weasel Rating: 6
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People who added this item 9223 Average listal rating (5766 ratings) 7 IMDB Rating 7.8
Cal Hockley

Cal doesn't treat his fiance well, but gets aggitated when her eye roams to a loveable, working class yank. Cal frames Jack for theft and leaves him to drown, tied to a pipe, later attempting to shoot both the lovers. Cal then uses a child to make his escape from the ship and beats back the desperate men attempting to board the life boat.

Weasel Rating: 5
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People who added this item 921 Average listal rating (558 ratings) 6.8 IMDB Rating 7.4
Billy Ray Cobb
James Louis 'Pete' Willard


Racist, badly dressed hicks with mullets tear up the town, using their shot guns and KKK anonymity.

Weasel Rating: 5
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Fergie

A sidekick through and through. His only action is hiding and running. He even tried to sell out Dredd by chumming up to some cannibals, little did he know.

Weasel Rating: 5
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Cpl Upham

Upham befriends a nazi and convinces Cpt. Miller to release him, later that same rogue nazi shoots our valient hero, who dies from his wounds, good one Upham! Our Nazi loving friend did have some good intentions however and gets a lower Weasel rating.

Weasel Rating: 4
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Those snide, sneaky, weasely characters that everyone hates. They gain power (albeit temporarily) not through strength or bravery but through underhanded schemes and bad form.

This list names and shames cinema's worst weasels, from the most weasely to the least.

Points System:

Mandatory:


* Not a main character (sidekick or lower)
* Slimey
* Coward
* Counteracted by stallion/hero

Extras:

Hiding +1
Running +1
Smugness +1
Greasy hair +1
Taking a beating +1
Motivated by profit +1
Didn't earn their position +1
Unremorseful +1
No integrety +1

Big Weasel Bonus

Trechory/Betrayal +2
Squealing +2
Weasel features (Not inc. Beaner tache) +2
Beaner Moustache +2
Wetting themself +3

Weasel Spoilers

Genuine act(s) of bravey -2
Square jaw or hench body - 2
Unintended harm - 1
Shows remorse -1



















N.B. Again, thankyou Kryptic Centurion for your help with this list, anything written well or showing keen orgnisational skill were made by him.

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