British Comedy: Bottom

Years: 1991-1995
Broadcaster: BBC
Genre: Sitcom
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall
Stars: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall
Episodes: 18
Episode Average: 8.222

BEST EPISODES:
Culture (1992), Holy (1992)

SERIES ONE

(1991)
6 episodes
Series Score: 47
Episode Average: 7.83
Perfect 10's: 0

S1E1

SMELLS

Originally broadcast: 17 September 1991
Directed by: Ed Bye
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Oh cheer up Richie, there's loads and loads of ugly birds in the world,
one of them's bound to do it with you sooner or later.

"Oh, cheer up, Richie! There's loads and loads of ugly birds in the world. One of 'ems bound to do it with you sooner or later."

HOLY GODIVA 3 - ONION JACK 4
TOTAL: 7

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S1E2

GAS

Originally broadcast: 24 September 1991
Directed by: Ed Bye
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

The gas man calls after there are reports of someone paying too much for their gas, leaving Richie and Eddie desperately trying to cover their crime.

"Nice trousers, they remind me of a story I know... a long story, lasts about fifteen minutes. Erm, once upon a time there was a big forest, and in the middle of the forest there lived some trousers called Dave."

HOLY GODIVA 4 - ONION JACK 5
TOTAL: 9

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S1E3

CONTEST

Originally broadcast: 1 October 1991
Directed by: Ed Bye
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Eddie's had his dole money stopped and has wasted £1.50 of his last £11.80 on a sexy magazine, leaving only 30p, or so he says.

"Richard, I'm warning you, if you don't shut up and let me watch Miss World, I'm gonna stuff your head up your bum. You'll spend the rest of your life wandering about on all fours looking for the light switch."

HOLY GODIVA 4 - ONION JACK 4
TOTAL: 8

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S1E4

APOCALYPSE

Originally broadcast: 8 October 1991
Directed by: Ed Bye
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Richie and Eddie head for the funfair after Richie is left some money in a will, and after having his wallet stolen, Richie is told that he will die in three nights.

"Right, that's it... you're gonna get a knuckle sandwich, and I don't mean a sandwich with some knuckles in it, well I do actually, well no I don't really... but, well you're gonna get a smash in the chops and no questions asked anyway."

HOLY GODIVA 4 - ONION JACK 4
TOTAL: 8

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S1E5

'S UP

Originally broadcast: 15 October 1991
Directed by: Ed Bye
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Richie and Eddie are asked to look after their landlord's shop, but they head to the roof to watch cricket instead.

"What was your Red Indian name then? Running mouth? Sitting down? Talking bollocks?"

HOLY GODIVA 3 - ONION JACK 4
TOTAL: 7

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S1E6

ACCIDENT

Originally broadcast: 29 October 1991
Directed by: Ed Bye
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

It's Richie's birthday, and he gets plastered.

"You'll have to carry me to the toilet. Uh, you'll see my knob!"

HOLY GODIVA 4 - ONION JACK 4
TOTAL: 8

SERIES TWO

(1992)
6 episodes
Series Score: 55
Episode Average: 9.17
Perfect 10's: 4

S2E1

DIGGER

Originally broadcast: 1 October 1992
Directed by: Ed Bye
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Richie and Eddie sign up to a dating service, and while Eddie strikes out with only Sarah Ferguson on offer, Richie gets himself a date with a Lady of far too many names, but he doesn't last the distance.

"It's fish poo your dukeness, it comes out of a very expensive fish's bottom!"

HOLY GODIVA 5 - ONION JACK 5
TOTAL: 10

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S2E2

CULTURE

Originally broadcast: 8 October 1992
Directed by: Ed Bye
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

When Rumbelows take the telly away, Richie and Eddie are struggling to find something to do, but eventually decide on chess.

"Oh for heaven's sake, who prints these things? What is the point of having a clue if it doesn't fit the little hole?"

HOLY GODIVA 5 - ONION JACK 5
TOTAL: 10

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S2E3

BURGLARY

Originally broadcast: 15 October 1992
Directed by: Ed Bye
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Much to Richie's disgust, Eddie comes in drunk again, but attention is soon diverted when burglars are heard downstairs.

"Er, oh yes, I've been sleep-doodling, I'm very bad at it."

HOLY GODIVA 4 - ONION JACK 4
TOTAL: 8

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S2E4

PARADE

Originally broadcast: 22 October 1992
Directed by: Ed Bye
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Richie and Eddie steal a Falklands war veteran's leg and sell it so they can make some money on a dead cert.

"What, you sucked water in through your eyes?"

HOLY GODIVA 3 - ONION JACK 4
TOTAL: 7

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S2E5

HOLY

Originally broadcast: 29 October 1992
Directed by: Ed Bye
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Christmas is the same as always, terrible food, naff decorations, and the ruddy nativity!

"Oh look... the three kings... gold, Frankenstein, and Grrrr, a virgin birth, and look... a blue headscarf, I mean that really tops it off. It's all slotting into place, I knew I was special. I always knew I was different from the other people, that's why I never got a shag, being kept pure, because I'm better than everyone else in the whole world."

HOLY GODIVA 5 - ONION JACK 5
TOTAL: 10

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S2E6

'S OUT

Originally broadcast: 10 April 1995*
Directed by: Ed Bye
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Richie and Eddie go camping for a week to win a bet, but they only have a packet of Hob Nobs and a tin opener, unless they can catch a Womble.

"Now can we just get our equipment out? I mean get our... I mean get our tackle out, no I mean get our gear... oh god! You can't say anything without some dreadful double entendre lurking around the corner!"

HOLY GODIVA 5 - ONION JACK 5
TOTAL: 10

*Originally scheduled for 5 November 1992, but wasn't broadcast for reasons of sensitivity.

SERIES THREE

(1992)
6 episodes
Series Score: 46
Episode Average: 7.67
Perfect 10's: 0

S3E1

HOLE

Originally broadcast: 6 January 1995
Directed by: Bob Spiers
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Richie and Eddie are trapped on a Ferris wheel, and it's due to be demolished the next day.

"Well if you had the common decency to go out and get yourself a proper job, and not hang around the flat all day like some vast slug, then perhaps I'd have the opportunity to take my top off and wash it without the risk of you seeing my nipples."

HOLY GODIVA 4 - ONION JACK 3
TOTAL: 7

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S3E2

TERROR

Originally broadcast: 13 January 1995
Directed by: Bob Spiers
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Richie and Eddie go trick-or-treating armed with an electric cattle prod, before trying to raise the devil.

"You don't wear slippers when you're raising the evil one!"

HOLY GODIVA 4 - ONION JACK 5
TOTAL: 9

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S3E3

BREAK

Originally broadcast: 20 January 1995
Directed by: Bob Spiers
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Richie and Eddie prepare for their holiday to Doncaster.

"Wind smear? I don't think we need to take the contents of your underpants?"

HOLY GODIVA 4 - ONION JACK 4
TOTAL: 8

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S3E4

DOUGH

Originally broadcast: 27 January 1995
Directed by: Bob Spiers
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Eddie's attempts at forgery annoy the local counterfeiter, so Eddie, Richie, Dave and Spudgun enter a quiz at the Lamb and Flag to pay him off.

"Eddie, A. the Queen doesn't have jugs, she's royalty, and B. if she did, she certainly wouldn't get them out on the back of a fiver, certainly not, she'd save them up for the fifty."

HOLY GODIVA 3 - ONION JACK 3
TOTAL: 6

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S3E5

FINGER

Originally broadcast: 3 February 1995
Directed by: Bob Spiers
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Eddie and Richie steal a car, and it are hotel tickets for a honeymooning couple, so they decide to disguise themselves as the newlyweds.

"It said 'lifts and separates', not 'slings 'em round the back'."

HOLY GODIVA 4 - ONION JACK 4
TOTAL: 8

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S3E6

CARNIVAL

Originally broadcast: 10 February 1995
Directed by: Bob Spiers
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Richie and Eddie go looting during riots, and then try to make a home movie.

"Well there's plenty of room in my trousers... sadly!"

HOLY GODIVA 4 - ONION JACK 4
TOTAL: 8

FILM

(1992)

FILM

GUEST HOUSE PARADISO

Released: 1999
Directed by: Adrian Edmondson
Written by: Adrian Edmondson, Rik Mayall

Richie and Eddie are running a hotel next to a nuclear power plant, where they feed radioactive fish to the guests.

"As we always say at the Guest House Paradiso... Have fun, don't go in the water if you know what's good for you, and try not to get shit on the sheets."

HOLY GODIVA 4 - ONION JACK 4
TOTAL: 8

EDWARD ELIZABETH HITLER*

played by Adrian Edmondson
18 episodes
in... Smells (1991)

*Eddie Elizabeth Ndingombaba in Guest House Paradiso

RICHARD RICHARD*

played by Rik Mayall
18 episodes
in... Digger (1992)

*Richard Twat in Guest House Paradiso

SPUDGUN

played by Steven O'Donnell
5 episodes
in... Parade (1992)

DAVE HEDGEHOG

played by Christopher Ryan
5 episodes
in... Accident (1991)

DICK HEAD

played by Lee Cornes
3 episodes
in... Dough (1995)