Random Thoughts and Observations on Film - 2013

Chunk is really fucking stupid.

I get that he's obese and loves food, but Jesus Christ. It's like the only thing that matters to him. I feel like he would have sold out the rest of the Goonies for a slice of pizza. He probably grew up to be a food whore.

Biggest shocker of the year: Only God Forgives' screenplay was longer than four pages!!!!!!

Only God Forgives Screenplay

Damn Andrew Lincoln, are you pissing in the writer's drink or something? First, you lose the girl you love to your best friend, then your wife get's eaten by zombies. You're no James Marsden, but watch out.

The dwarfs are such slobs. If I were Bilbo, I would have just kicked them out of my house and been done with it. Also, did we really need a half hour of them eating and dribbling food on themselves? Thank God they evolved the characters from there into likeability.

*SPOILER*


First, so much better than the first. I loved it. Second, did I see Stephen Colbert as the guy with the eye patch in Lake-town?

[Update: Colbert himself confirmed a cameo on the Late Show. Whether I was correct or not about who he was is still in the air.]

I thought ghosting was when you took a shit, but found nothing in the toilet. Think about it Shyamalan.

While I think the Mandarin twist in itself was great, shocking and unexpected, the movie dies after it. Guy Pearce is a great actor, but his character is your average stock villain. The biggest problem I have with it though is that it once again ruins the opportunity to give Tony Stark a worthy adversary, and to make the Iron Man trilogy one of the best comic sagas ever.

And the Oscar for Greatest Nonsensical Rambling in a Motion Picture goes to...

Ruben Blades as Jefe for "Choices".