2013 Movies I've Seen

Though it is from the creative minds behind the first Hangover film, 21 & Over is vastly inferior and rarely funny. It is a formulaic mess of a movie with unlikable characters, illogical depictions of alcohol at times, and actually copies scenes from the Hangover. Look at that end scene where Jeff Chang confronts his father telling him that he doesn't want to be a doctor and tell me its not blatantly mirroring the scene in the Hangover where Stu Stands up for himself to his wife. It's a forgettable and disappointing would-be comedy.

C-

Oh Keanu Reeves. What happened? Sure, you were never a guy who'll be praised for his diverisity and range in his skills as an actor, but you always chose such original and fun projects that were entertaining, thought-provoking, and exciting. Now, with 47 Ronin, you've done the unthinkable. You actually made a movie worse than the Matrix sequels. But, I have faith you'll have a comeback. This, however, is a thoroughly annoying cinematic mistake that ignores and insults Japanese culture and heritage by casting a white dude in the lead, takes huge liberties with the Japanese legend it is based on by Amarican-izing the hell out of it, and by making every Japanese character speak English at all times. If anything, I thought this might be a guilty pleasure sort of movie, but the biggest crime is that apart from the final battle, it's a boring and unenjoyable experience.

C-

While the film is admittedly overlong by at the very least a half an hour, this is a very genuine character study that is wholly unique, amazingly acted, well written, beautifully shot and very original film that meandors at its own pace, while still depicting young women, sexuality and romantic hardship with such refreshing honesty.

A-

With the first film being as surprisingly hilarious as it was I had high hopes for this one. But it suffered from a poorly written script, an unfortunate absence of the orginal directing duo who went on to do the 21 Jump Street movies, and an abundance of bad jokes mostly made up of groan enducing food puns. It'll be for some enjoyable colourful entertainment for young children but fails to transcend the audience demographic as well as films like Shrek, How to Train Your Dragon, or even the first Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs.

C

Beautifully animated, well written, and hilarious movie that entertains adults as well as kids. Is it in anyway historically acurate? Hell no. There's fucking land whales with elephant legs for fuck sake. There's a few pacing issues here and there where the story drags a bit. But it's brief and the plot moves along nicely. The characters are all funny with some really good voice work from Nicolas Cage who is the absolute funniest character, along with Emma Stone, Ryan Reynolds, Clark Duke, and Catherine Keener. It's an original and well made movie that looks awesome and scores big laughs throughout and although it doesn't rank alongside other Dreamworks animated greats like Shrek, Kung Fu Panda and How to Train Your Dragon it is a big step above others like Shark Tale, Antz, Monsters vs Aliens Madagascar movies and the Shrek Sequels. Which aren't all bad, some were but not all. This movie is actually pretty damn good.

B+

A masterfully crafted character study I wish I was lucky enough to see in the theatre. Matthew McConaughey delivers his best performance and the cast surrounding him are just as good. In particular is Jared Leto in a role truly deserving of the Oscar. I know I'm just kind of repeating everything that's been said about the movie ever since it first came out. Well, I didn't get to see it when it had its theatrical run, but I've seen it now and I am very glad I did.

A-

I feel like people forgot about this movie and how good it actually is. Joseph Gordon Levitt while giving one of his best performances crafts an enjoyable, genuinely hilarious, very smart and well written film as a first time director and screenwriter and it is also filled with other great performances alongside his from Scarlett Johansson and Julianne Moore among others. This is a very smart and entertaining movie with a lot to say and I recommend it highly.

B+

This was a modestly enjoyable film with impressive animation and decent voice acting, but still falls flat in many storytelling areas. Not that these issues were particuarily painful or bad or anything. But, these issues impact the film making its title less than accurate. I just found that the story was highly predictable and tends to drag in places. Another problem I had was with the dialogue. The delivery was as good as it could've been but it never felt believeable. It was clunky and overly expository. On the positive side though, this was a film I felt that if one took their kid to it they would have a great time. It's visually apealing and Christoph Waltz makes for a good villain often getting some good laughs. Pretty decent, but not worthy of the title of "Epic".

B-

As a fan of the original Evil Dead and its' superior sequels, I approached the very existence of a remake of such an influential and effective horror classic without much enthusiasm. That is until a red band trailer was released which promised a lot of blood and a lot of intensity and so I had to see it for myself. I am surprisingly pleased to report that this remake was a mostly effective ride drenched in gallons of blood and guts, and that's exactly what an Evil Dead film should be.

First time feature director, Fede Alvarez knows what the fanbase wants to see out of a modern day Evil Dead movie and delivers on that basis. The complete absence of any CGI involved in any kill sequence was such a breathe of fresh air. It's so refreshing to see people go back to what was truly effective by using prostetics, props, fake blood and makeup enhancments makes it feel like an 80s horror movie throwback seen through a modern day lense. I think of remakes of other popular 80s horror classics such as Nightmare on Elm Street or Friday the 13th which studios decide to make only based on the brand name alone, dump a huge budget on top of them and CGI everything in the film and by doing so the filmmakers remove the grit and believability and the films become hollow. Watch the Freddy through the wall scene from both the original which used a sheet of spandex painted the same color as the wall and the CGI version from the 2010 remake and tell me which is better. CGI doesn't belong in horror films like this because no matter how good the computer can make things it just can't beat the practical effects. Alvarez understood that and gave us a beautifully disgusting gorefest with dismemberments, injuries and kills that keep topping the one before it. There were actual cheers in the audience I was sitting with when a chainsaw is creatively used. The tone is really moody and haunting with ability to sprinkle in some comedic elements here and there as well with ease.

While I praise the film on the technical level of its blood and gore this film is not without its faults. The dialogue at times felt contrived or cliche, and the characters make insanely stupid decisions left and right that annoy the living hell out of me, and some of the performances I found to be kind of flat and dull. Particuarly from the film's male lead, Shiloh Fernandez who was a complete bore. But regardless from those misgivings the film knows exactly what it is supposed to be, it is an Evil Dead movie and it doesn't shy away from that. The film rarely loses momentum and while I wasn't really ever scared during the experience the film was consistently entertained. This was a solid hell of a good time at the movies.

B+

This movie was impressive on a number of levels. The animation was beautiful and unique, the characters were relatable and interesting, the writing was surprisingly strong for a Disney movie about princesses and magic, the songs were mostly memorable and well done, and the humor was effective throughout the film. It's much smarter than one might think it is. The characters aren't drawn out as black and white. The motivations, problems and feelings the characters deal with are understandable and relatable and the villain you half expect one princess to become is treated differently and more intelligently than most movies in it's genre. A few songs and jokes feel forced here and there but not very often. Frozen is a rare and surprising gem that will entertain both adults and children while becoming a more than welcome addition into the Disney collection.

A-

When I watched this movie for the first time, I had with me a bottle of Kraken rum in hand and vowed to take a shot every single time I felt the movie was either insulting my intelligence or just too damn stupid. Man, that bottle was almost fucking empty when I was through with it. I wasn't the biggest G.I. Joe fan growing up but I did somewhat enjoy it for it's goofiness, and I didn't much care for the first film which is surprisingly worse. But, as drunk as I was, I'll admit there were a few good things it had going for it: 1. Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson elevates the enjoyment of every film he's in for me. He's a good actor, has a commanding presence and he does his best with the material given to him. 2. They fixed Cobra Commander. Poor Joseph Gordon Levitt was stuck inside that excuse for a costume doing the best he could in the first movie. The bigger problem I had with that version of the character though was that he looked nothing like the cartoon. This version does and they made him look awesome. Sure, he doesn't have the silly Cobra Commander cartoon voice but he does look badass. The only problem is that he has too little screen time. I was hoping for a one on one confrontation with him and Roadblock but that didn't happen. So I took another shot. 3. Snake Eyes looks much bette and there is a pretty cool fight scene involving him and a bunch of ninja on a mountain side. Apart from that the movie is pretty relentless in it's stupidity. The main reason for that being the script. It's full of holes, terrible dialogue, dumbass scenes, and truly ridiculous action. I don't mind for action movies to have stupid action that may be totally implausable as long as I'm invested. I was never invested, maybe partly because of the booze. Not even Channing Tatum's absence could save it. This is not a good movie but at least it for me drunk.

D+

This film doesn't reinvent the wheel as far as the gangster genre but it's done so well and it makes for a very entertaining movie going experience. Zombieland director Ruben Fleicher trades in his comedy chops for tension and drama in a story carried on the shoulders of the entire cast. Not a single performance fell flat. Everyone involved from Josh Brolin, Ryan Gosling, Emma Stone, Nick Nolte, Anthony Mackie, Giovanni Ribisi others deliver stellar work and are each uniquely effective and memorable in their roles. Sean Penn, however, was the major highlight of the film for me. His brute, tyrannical and vicious portrayal of L.A. crime boss Mickey Cohen makes for a great villain. The movie is very neo-noir with lots of vibrant colors and stylized gun fights and action sequences and the pacing is well done and effective. I highly reccommend this movie.

B+

I remember seeing a far superior version of this kinda story long ago when it was called Phone Booth. There in that movie the performances were great, it was intense and suspensful and the movie wasn't predictable. I guess what it comes down to is although it has two decent performances and a cool visual style, Grand Piano is a conveluted derrivitive thriler that is too predictable and at times confusing. Elijah Wood does decent work and John Cusack has the right voice for the villainous role and the two of them along with the movies's cinematography raise the movie up a notch.

B-

This is one of the best films I've seen in the past ten years. Better than that, it's one of the most reletlessly tense, ingeniously, beautifully and precisely shot, visually stunning, brilliantly directed, and completely immersive films from first frame to last, that I've seen in my entire life. This is a masterpiece and warrants every bit of praise it gets. Hopefully the Academy remembers this come Oscar season.

A+

Baz Lurhman and his artistic visions of his films don't sit right with me and, for me, never reached a particularly memorable level of entertainment value. But, for this adaptation, he creates a visual splendor filled with great performances across the board, great cinematography, visual effects, costumes, sets all backed up by a well told story. Leonardo DiCaprio is fantastic as always and Tobey Maguire (who narrates the film) did a fine job in his role and this is an actor I am usually irritated by. One problem I found with the film was the soundtrack. There are occasional songs used in the film that are well done and work with the story and imagery. But, for me, mostly all of the soundtrack felt as though it clashed with the time period it was portraying and occasionally distracted me and took away from some of the enjoyment. Overall, a visual delight backed by great performances from DiCaprio and company.

B

I still believe that Adam Sandler has talent left. But with these Grown Ups movies that talent is absent. It's also incredible that you have a cast full of talented comedians and the only funny one in the movie is Nick Swardson. But his laughs came within the first 10 minutes. Then it was all down hill. The movie has absolutely no plot whatsoever. It's just a day in the life of these guys as they stumble from one stupid joke that falls flat to another which gets worse and worse. Sandler is a talented writer as well as an actor. He wrote Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore and Big Daddy which I liked a lot. So I know that he's got some talent left as a writer, and as an actor that talent is far from lost as shown in the really underrated Funny People. I'd love to see him do more stuff like that and leave this kind of safe, lifeless crap alone for Rob Schneider who actually said no to doing the sequel. If Schneider says no then it has to be bad.

D+

Unlike the second installment this finale wasn't a predictable rehash of the original. There were quite a few surprises, hugely hilarious moments galore, and an actual character arc with Allan played by Zach Galifianakis. The rest of the cast does well also but in particular is Ken Jeong's Mr. Chow who steals the movie and is the funniest he's been in any of the films. John Goodman does good work as the villain Marshall as well and the abcence of an actual "hangover" with substitutional hilarious alternative brought on by Jeong and Goodman's characters as the catylist for the events that unfold makes for a more interesting experience. It's a satisfying cap on the series.

B+

For a cheesy, dumb, tun your brain off kinda flick I found this to be pretty entertaining for what it was. Had I seen it in the theatre I may not have thought the same thing but I watched it on Netflix and I thought it was a funny and fairly entertaining popcorn flick. I thought it was creative, the makeup was really good, some of the action sequences were well done and the humor was effective. Doesn't elevate more than an enjoyable dumb romp with some cool action, but that's the job it had and it succeeded more than it didn't.

B-

Not nearly as horrendous as I thought it would be, but it's nothing that spectacular. The best case scenario for this entry in the dying art of spoof genre comedies would have been for Marlon Wayans and company to reach levels of hilarity they did with the very first Scary Movie. While this doesn't come close to that it does admittedly have some funny moments and unlike Disaster Movie, Meet the Spartans, and recently even Scary Movie 5 the jokes and story have focus to them and they aren't ever just throwing in a pop culture reference to something that was popular in the past few months. It's mostly just Paranormal Activity spoofs with a dash of Blair Witch, The Devil Inside, and The Exorcist. NOt bad, but nothing too groundbreaking or memorable.

C+

Just on principle I should have hated this movie. It has everything that should make it easy to pick apart and ridicule. It has a very thin and overly cliched plot that is a paint-by-numbers buddy cop movie but instead of cops they are FBI and instead if male leads they're Sandra Bullock and Melissa McCarthy. Another thing, this movie has Sandra Bullock in it and while I'm not usually the kinda guy who just hates on actors, Sandra Bullock is one of the people I'm rarely impressed with. That's not to say that opinion had changed with this movie. She basically plays he same character she did in The Proposal only she's an FBI agent. However, with all that said, Melissa McCarthy and some of the dialogue she has with other characters saves this movie and elevates it to a level of quality filled with hard laughs and a very entertaining experience. It seems like one of those movies I could watch over again if it were on TV or something. It was enjoyable, hilarious and despite its cliche-ridden script it is very entertaining.

B

Despite having the biggest cliffhanger since The Empire Strikes Back this is one of the most immersive and exciting films of the entire year. It's filled with amazing action, it's often funny, and never feels overlong to me. Like the last Hobbit adventure I could've stayed in that theatre for hours more than it was. There's little to complain about here, apart from one brief moment when a go-pro camera was used and it was painfully obivious and took you out of the moment. But that's all for me at least as far as complaints. The biggest moment of the movie though is the confrontation between Bilbo and Smaug. It's intense and brilliant. Benedict Cumberbatch does the motion capture performance and it is perfect casting and an entirely believeable achievment in CGI. It's a brilliant and enthralling action-packed adventure and I cannot wait for it's conclusion.

A+