The Best of Aubrey Plaza

Emily
"If you want to tell me what to do, put me on the fucking payroll!"

Ingrid Thorburn
"Fuck me, Bruce. Gotham needs you."

Riley Johnson
"Yeah, so, the thing that I can relate to is being in love with somebody that is too afraid to show the world who they are. But that was a long time ago."

Harper Spiller
"We're all entertaining each other while the world burns."

Allison
"I still love you. I don't care what happened. I still love you, Bear. I'll always love you."

April Ludgate
"The only things I like are dogs, sleeping late, and weird birthmarks."

Sarah

Darius
"I guess I remember being happy when I was a kid. Back when you just naturally expect good things to happen."

Brandy Klark
"I've decided to lose my virginity to Rusty Waters."

Daisy Danby
"I am sick of these guys' rap songs. They say 'Girl, drop it like it's hot', 'Shake it'. I want to make a rap song that says 'Boy, brush your teeth, give me your jacket, I'm fucking freezing.'"

Julie Powers
"They're called jobs, something a *censored* ball like you wouldn't know anything about. And by the way, I can't *censored* believe you asked Ramona out after I specifically told you not to *censored* do that!"

Kelly

Beth
"The minute you leave my boyfriends not gonna come over, we're not gonna make out on the counter or anything like that."

Aubrey Plaza

Greek Council President