Sex with a Stranger - "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend"

Please don't be a murderer.

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Starring Rachel Bloom
Written by Rachel Bloom, Adam Schlesinger, Jack Dolgen and Sono Patel
Directed by Stuart MacDonald

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"Sex with a Stranger"

Steppin’ in the club
All those eyes on me
But there’s only one pair that I see
He got a tight ass bod
Big brown eyes
Come on, cutie get between my thighs

Cause I...
I don’t even know, your name

It’s Jason
Shh don’t tell me, don’t tell me

Why...
Don’t we just call each other baby

It’ll be simpler

Hey sexy stranger, come back to my place
And I hope you’re not a murderer
Kiss me, baby, all over the place
And please don’t be a murderer

Please don’t be a murderer
Please don’t be a murderer

I’m sorry I’ll stop talking ‘bout the murderer thing
Let me get back to playin’ with your thing
You got a beautiful ass
Strong ass arms
Is that a gun?! Oh thank God, it’s just your penis.

Have...
You been tested for STD’s
STD’s, tell me please, STD’s

Then...
Waited the three month window
And got tested again
Just makin’ sure
Most people don’t know about the window.

Hey sexy stranger let’s go to my place
And please don’t harvest my kidney.
Don’t give me that, incredulous face
I saw a movie like that on Lifetime

Uh, your balls smell weird
Your balls smell so much worse than I feared.
You was dancin’ in the club for at least a couple hours
Please go wash your balls in the shower
The bathroom is right down the hall, ok?
Please don’t steal anything on the way, (don’t steal!)

Hey sexy stranger
I’ll be right back
I just forgot to do the dishes
Feel free to jerk off to stay in the mood

I promise I’ll be back
ok see you in a second, bye.