DIE ANTWOORD NINJA didn't do very good at school because all he did the whole time was write raps and smoke zol.
After NINJA lied and cheated his way through high school, he moved to Alexandra Township in Johannesburg to smoke zol with the rastas.
NINJA stayed in Alexandra in 19th Street down by the river for a few years living off boiled cabbage and zol.
During this time NINJA started a rap group called The Original Evergreens which had a heavy stoned alien rastas in space vibe.
The Original Evergreen even won a South African Music Award for this one fokken stupid stoner song called Puff The Magik.
After NINJA moved out of Alex he moved around a lot lamming from couch to couch and bumming off people while he tried to think of more stoned rap ideas.
From time to time NINJA moved back home to his mom and dad's house for a nice hot shower and some lekker munchies.
NINJA has known YO-LANDI VI$$ER for a very long time from when she was a little laaitie.
One day when NINJA moved back home with his mom & dad again he saw that little YO-LANDI from next door had grown some boobs and a nice bum.
Then NINJA had a baby with YO-LANDI by accident.
NINJA and YO-LANDI are not married.
They are just good friends.
YO-LANDI likes to do her own thing and doesn't like people telling her what to do.
Smoking so much weed all the time made NINJA think of all these stupid ideas for rap groups like fokken Max Normal, Constructus, Markus Wormstorm Is Not Gay, MC Totally Rad and DJ Fu*k are Fu*knRad, The Way of the Dassie, Total Confusion on Planet Phunk, Total Fu*k Up etc etc.
NINJA even got so stoned one day that he started to make cute little soft toys with magic powers.
NINJA forced YO-LANDI to help him make hundreds of these fokken toys by hand to try get some money to buy diapers.
None of NINJA'S stoned ideas ever blew up, so time after time he would throw them in the trash and try again.
NINJA'S name used to be Waddy Jones. One day Waddy Jones did something really fokken stupid.
Like a total fokken doos, Waddy dressed in full military camouflage and took a djembe drum and a big sack of weed with him to a Legalize Marajuana protest outside the steps of parliament in Cape Town.
Waddy arrived at the Legalize Marajuana protest early to get a good seat.
The police had even made a nice little fence around the area where all the irie protestors could sit.
Waddy was rolling himself a lekker duk zol as the other irie protestors slowly started pulling into the little fenced area to make their protest.
About 20 irie protestors pitched up including the organizer of the protest who had even brought along a big weed plant to give to Nelson Mandela as a present.
Then all-of-a-sudden 5 big armour-plated Caspers pulled in filled with about 100 fokken cops who arrested Waddy Jones and all the other irie protestors sitting inside the little fence.
When Waddy got out of jail, he changed his name to NINJA and suddenly got much better at rapping.
Soon after this NINJA went to go visit his homeboy DJ HI-TEK who makes fat gang$ta rap beats on his PC Computer in his bedroom.
DJ HI-TEK had also got much better at making beats while NINJA was in jail.
So NINJA and DJ HI-TEK joined forces and tried think of a spif name for their new zef gang$ta rap group they were going to start.
DJ HI-TEK got the idea to get a sexy chick to join the group to make it more commercial.
So NINJA started to train little YO-LANDI VI$$ER to rap.
During her ninja rap training YO-LANDI got the idea to add some rave vibes to their tjoons make their zef rap group more even more next level.
NINJA, YO-LANDI and DJ HI-TEK discovered DIE ANTWOORD when their 3rd eyes got opened at this rave they threw at NINJA'S parent's house this one time when NINJA'S parents went on holiday to Sun City.
The whole experience was so fokken next level that they are even making a movie about it called THE ANSWER.
You are soon going to be able to go watch THE ANSWER on the big screen with popcorn, Coke and M&M'S and maybe even a free NINJA, YO-LANDI VI$$ER or DJ HI-TEK toy!
DJ HI-TEK is scared of flying, and so he doesn't always perform live with DIE ANTWOORD.
Luckily DJ HI-TEK'S little cousin, VUILGEBOOST aka HI-TEK JUNIOR has some serious DJ skillz and so when DJ HI-TEK is not in the mix, VUILGEBOOST freaks the beats live with DIE ANTWOORD zef rap-rave crew.
NINJA'S name is NINJA. If you see NINJA in the streets act like you know.
Don't act like a poes and call him some other name.
DJ HI-TEK has just broken up with his girlfriend again.
The man is single and ready to mingle so if you see HI-TEK in da club come give him a hug!
YO-LANDI VI$$ER'S rat recently had 10 babies.
They are all growing up so fast!
Whether you like it or not DIE ANTWOORD are here to stay.
They are about to drop their 1st album called $O$ on Interscope fokken Records, then their 2nd album called TEN$ION, then their 3rd album, then their 4th album and then their 5th album. Full fokken flex! Fre$! Mega-zef!
Go!
In your fokken face b*tch.
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