Tooth Fairy Reviews

Why on Earth every single major action movie star always get involved in some worthless comedies? Sylverster Stallone did it ('Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot'), Arnold Schwarzenegger did it ('Jingle All the Way'), Vin Diesel did it ('The Pacifier') and now it is Dwayne Johnson AKA 'The Rock's turn to make the same mistake (Jason Statham has been smart enough so far to keep away from such comedies). What a terrible flick... A few weeks ago, I saw 'Hop', another bad movie, which was dealing with the easter bunny and this time around, they chose to make a movie about the toothfairy... How come I was not excited by this concept? Because it was simply a very bad idea... Furthermore, it was just sad to see Ashley Judd to play such a thankless role. I mean, it has been maybe 5 years since I saw her and she used to be on the A list at the end of the 90's and the beginning of the 2000's. Same thing for Billy Crystal. Apparently, it was his first live-action movie role in 8 years. What a way to make a come-back... Anyway, the whole thing was just an inane and stupid familly feature and an incredible waste of talent. To conclude, it was pretty bad, I didn't like it at all and it is not worth a look whatsoever.

I have to admit that I really like watching Dwayne Johnson in pretty much everything he does. Ashley Judd, I can do without, and her character could have been played by anyone. But this story about a hockey player made to be a tooth fairy for punishment, is charming, clever, and good fun to watch. I have seen it two or three times now, and it's going to be added to the permanent collection :)

A FADA DO DENTE - Derek Thompson (Dwayne Johnson) é um jogador de hóquei frustrado que só faz sucesso por causa de suas violentas faltas que, invariavelmente, arrancam um dente do adversário. Daí veio o seu apelido, dado pelo fãs, de Fada dos Dentes. Só que ele é um cara que não acredita nos sonhos e, num dia, quase conta para a pequena Tess (Destiny Whittlock), filha de sua namorada (Ashley Judd), que esse negócio de Fada trocar dente de leite debaixo do travesseiro por moeda era uma grande mentira. Como punição por ser um "destruidor de sonhos", Derek é transformado em uma fada do dente. Agora, sob o comando da chefe das fadas Lily (Julie Andrews) e o acompanhamento do assistente Tracy (Stephen Merchant), o estraga prazeres precisará se ambientar com suas novas asas e o mundo da magia, que ele tanto despreza, antes de ser um simples humano novamente. (RC)

"You can't handle the tooth! And that's the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth! I pledge allegiance to the tooth!"

Remember Judd Apatow's 2009 project, Funny People? While a lousy and flat film, it at one stage cleverly poked fun at actors who have long renounced their dignity for the sake of a paycheck. Tooth Fairy is exactly the type of noxious family entertainment parodied in Apatow's flick. It mixes a few recognisable faces with a nauseating amount of schmaltz, a one-joke premise, and pedestrian filmmaking, resulting in an excruciating flick which is so unbelievably cheesy that one could mistake it for a cheese emporium. Added to this, its target audience appears to be strangely specific - those in the first grade. Second graders are far too old for this tosh, and would easily see through the shitty script. Anyone younger is just too young, as the intricacies of fairy politics would be too complex for their little minds. First graders will enjoy this, however. I just hope they keep it away from the rest of us.

Former WWE Wrestler Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson displayed at least some charisma in his action hero roles in the past, but his decision to pursue family-friendly entertainment has only dented the star's once-promising career. Johnson's character here, Derek Thompson, is a hockey player with a fierce reputation, which has earned him the nickname "Tooth Fairy" due to his ability to smash the holy hell out of anyone on the ice. He's also a loudmouth cynic whose dreams were crushed by injury. One night, Derek explains to his girlfriend's daughter (Whitlock) that the Tooth Fairy doesn't exist, which absolutely horrifies his girlfriend Carly (Judd). As a consequence, Derek is summoned to the land of fairies for the crime of disbelief, and is forced to serve as an actual tooth fairy for a couple of weeks.

The screenplay (credited to a whopping five writers) peddles the same tiresome themes that all family comedies are concerned about these days, and is structured like every other family flick of the past decade. At first Derek is mean, but he learns lessons, rekindles his passion for life, bonds with his girlfriend's son (who, of course, initially resents Derek), and in the process gets caught up in slapstick shenanigans. Tooth Fairy follows this tedious road map without fail, hitting comedic beats any intelligent person can predict a mile away. As a matter of fact, the film revisits the mythology of the Tooth Fairy in a fashion that mixes Fred Claus, Elf and The Santa Clause, in which a non-believer of a children's fantasy learns that said fantasy is in fact real. He also finds out the fantasy is a funded operation, and lack of believers is threatening the future. Why couldn't the movie have mirrored Bad Santa instead? At least that would've been funny... Imagine Derek walking into a child's room, and telling the kid "Give me your fucking tooth, you little brat. I've had too much to drink and I'm in a bad fucking mood". Hey, that's funnier than anything in the actual movie.

Every single inch of Tooth Fairy is unbelievably formulaic, to the extent that watching it becomes a process of waiting for the obvious set-ups to inevitably play out. For instance, Derek is told he will be handed a Tooth Fairy assignment at any random time, and, to force him to do it, his wings will sprout out and his clothes will be replaced with a fairy outfit. Thus, when Derek is getting intimate with Carly, WA-HEY - Derek is paged and an assignment is handed down, necessitating an awkward escape. During an important hockey match, WA-HEY - Derek has to leave on an assignment, hence another awkward exit. Anyone with half a brain will foresee such things happening. Director Lembeck is a terrible filmmaker, and was unable to imbue neither the fantasy world nor his routine shot construction with any flair or professionalism. Considering the $48 million budget, the ugly-looking film is very disappointing indeed; lacking energy and visual audacity. These things are truly irksome, but not as groan-inducing as the broad humour. Despite the five credited writers, Tooth Fairy hasn't got a single clever comic beat in its body.

Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson visibly struggles to retain his charisma here, resulting in a tragically flat performance. Stephen Merchant (whose work is decent) and the uncredited Billy Crystal are the only good things within Tooth Fairy. Crystal's one-scene cameo as a fairy inventor provides the film's only remotely amusing moments, and merely exists to highlight how fucking awful the rest of the movie is. Rubbing salt in the wound is Julie Andrews who's woeful as the magisterial head of the fairies, and Ashley Judd who's terrible as Derek's confused girlfriend. Johnson and Judd have the coldest and most contrived chemistry of recent memory.

Back in the 1990s, muscular action star Arnold Schwarzenegger put his career in danger by starring in awful family films such as Jingle All the Way. The difference between Arnie and The Rock, however, is that Schwarzenegger earned his family film slot by first starring in a number of awesome action films. Johnson, like Vin Diesel, too quickly ditched the action hero career in favour of kiddie movies before featuring in any awesome action flicks. Forgettable from the very minute it begins, and played without even a hint of such concepts as wit and originality, Tooth Fairy only finds time to feed the public's appetite for watching brawny, self-serious men wearing pink tutus, making animal noises and using shiny objects. This movie is awful...and that's the tooth!

1.8/10

That's the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth!

Former pro wrestler Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson has come a long way from his WWF roots. Now, he stars in this funny, heart-warming tale of a man who is forced to undergo a week of being a tooth fairy after telling his girlfriend's six year old daughter that tooth fairies don't exist. I'm getting used to seeing tough guys play real softies in family movies; the first being Vin Diesel in The Pacifier. Now, Johnson steps up to the plate as Derek Thompson, a pro hockey player who has been dubbed as the Tooth Fairy, based on his ability to knock the teeth off other hockey players. Despite the fame he gets from his offensive abilities on ice, Thompson isn't good with anything else. When a new player is introduced into the team, Thompson slowly fades into the background. One night, when Tess (Whitlock), the six year old daughter of his girlfriend, Carly (Judd), loses a tooth, he is quick to claim that tooth fairies don't exist, much to the disappointment of Carly. Because of this, Thompson is sentenced to a week of being a tooth fairy by Lily (Andrews), the head tooth fairy. According to the rules, he cannot miss an assignment, otherwise his sentenced will be extended for another week. Thompson now has to fit his tooth fairy duties along with his failing hockey career and his now unstable relationship with Carly and her kids. I loved the way they introduced the concept of tooth fairies in the film. The wings were obviously made of wire and cloth, but it didn't really matter; I became more focused on the actors rather than the materials used in the costumes. Johnson was hilarious as tough guy who is forced to go through what he thinks is a humiliating situation (look at him in those silk baby blue pajamas with matching wings and tell me that you didn't crack up). Andrews provided a regal bearing to the film as the head honcho of the tooth fairies. Although his part in the film was small compared to the other actors, Billy Crystal added to the comical moments of the film as well. Quite surprising was Brandon T. Jackson's cameo as the flying instructor. Loved this film - hope you fellows will too. :)