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Yet again, the folks at Disney have given their Talking Animal Movie Randomiser (™) a spin, and this time it's landed on the action-comedy G-Force - a technically impressive blend of live action and CGI about a gaggle of superspy guinea pigs in Mission: Impossible mode. Unfortunately, this is a film which relies so heavily on its central conceit that it neglects everything else. If the talking rodents were removed from the equation, G-Force would be an exceedingly generic spy adventure riddled with holes - and this is hardly a surprise, given that the screenplay was written by the husband-and-wife team of Cormac and Marianne Wibberley, who also penned Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle and Bad Boys II. This is a Jerry Bruckheimer movie as well, so this sort of thing is standard operating procedure for him.
As one would expect, the protagonists of G-Force are the rodents that constitute the titular group: 3 guinea pigs (Rockwell, Cruz, Morgan) and a high-tech mole (Cage). There's also a housefly on the team who does surveillance. (Believe it or not, not only can this fly understand English, but it has also surpassed its two-week lifespan! Amazing!) The human who heads this elite squad is Ben (Galifianakis), along with his assistant Marcie (Garner). While trying to uncover the insidious plan of electronics magnate Leonard Saber (Nighy), the G-Force is shut down following an unauthorised operation to get evidence. (Oh, that old plot point?) Eventually the rodents end up in a pet store where they're held for adoption, but wish to escape from captivity and take down Saber. From there it's Mission: Impossible meets Toy Story meets Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.
G-Force clearly feels the urge to present viewers with a sympathetic portrayal of talking animals when potential viewers, both young and old, would rather witness the heroes in all stages of miniature combat and furry teamwork instead. It's quite easy to be taken during the introductory sequences of the film. However, beyond this (possibly in a page count panic), the writers insist on an emotional conflict and heavy exposition, sticking to every hoary screenwriting template that submerges the heroes in doubt so a false sense of triumph can be concocted. The typical "learn to have faith in yourself" plot point eventually pops up out of no-where, and is resolved so quickly that it feels hastily thrown in simply because a clueless producer insisted on such a moment. This all kills the momentum of the picture. It's a mystery as to why movies can't take a page from Pixar, and learn how to have it both ways - to develop characters terrifically, while entertaining and gaining momentum along the way.
The pay-off of the whole story is an action sequence featuring a giant robot comprised of many small appliances. This whole set-piece just seems like a knee-jerk reaction to Transformers and an acknowledgement of the sequel. The clueless producers probably realised how much young boys love watching robots fighting, and figured it'd also belong in a movie about talking guinea pigs. G-Force is backed by a script that travels on autopilot; assuming that an assortment of fart jokes, cheesy one-liners and pop culture references will appease viewers of all ages. There are a few amusing moments, but every good punchline is countered by limp gags (for instance yuks about Facebook and Paris Hilton)... G-Force is just not an overly funny movie.
First-time director Hoyt Yeatman has enjoyed a long career as a special effects mastermind. He has presided over some of Hollywood's biggest blockbusters, ranging from Star Trek: The Motion Picture to Armageddon (he even earned an Academy Award for his work on James Cameron's The Abyss). His reward for all these efforts is the chance to finally helm a feature film of his own...in the form of G-Force. It's logical for Yeatman to be given CG-intensive material for his directorial debut, but he seems too distracted by the technical angle that he doesn't bother with decent storytelling. His misplaced attentions result in some truly incredible CGI work - the critters look extraordinarily realistic (only a few notches below photorealistic, in fact), and the faux Transformer is as impressive as anything that stomped around in Michael Bay's movies. When G-Force is locked in adventure mode, it's an unexpected charmer. The action set-pieces do have an impressive zing to them, backed by Trevor Rabin's fantastic score. But wouldn't it have been nice if such attention was given to the script & story, too? To an extent, the generic nature may be intentional - it's amusing to see action movie clichés re-enacted by guinea pigs. But once the novelty wears off, it's just an ordinary, by-the-numbers spy caper. And due to an action shortage, it's not fun enough.
The most depressing blow is the casting of Zach Galifianakis as the G-Force's handler. The bushy-bearded comedian broke out into mainstream cinema with 2009's surprise hit The Hangover in which he played a uniquely hilarious character. In G-Force, Galifianakis plays a cookie-cutter role; essentially the straight man to a trio of wisecracking guinea pigs. All the human actors - including Kellie Garner, Will Arnett and Billy Nighy - are mere props, and one wonders if the movie might've worked better if their characters were animated instead. The voice work is admittedly better than expected. Nicolas Cage clearly relished the opportunity to have fun with a goofy mole voice. The rest of the voice actors - Sam Rockwell as the leader of the group, Jon Favreau as a chubby, flatulent guinea pig, Steve Buscemi as a vicious hamster, Penélope Cruz as the obligatory female of the team, and Tracey Morgan as a wisecracking guinea pig operative - place forth solid work. Fairly forgettable, but not woeful.
G-Force is a halfway decent action-comedy. It simply doesn't trust itself enough to run carefree and enjoy the wacky premise...it's instead packed with achingly dull scripting and exposition that eats up most of the film. The special effects are very impressive of course, but the filmmakers should have understood that even with great animation, a lousy story is still a lousy story. Like all high profile summer releases, G-Force targets a particular audience and it will undoubtedly please them - after all it's just pleasant, inoffensive entertainment - but it's also pointless and instantly forgettable.
4.8/10
