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Sometimes movie-goers require a dosage of simple, unadulterated fun in the form of a film that's content with serving up a nourishing dose of action, violence and sex. So thank Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor that the delightful action-comedy Crank exists. Geared towards the dormant 13-year-old in every male, Crank doesn't merely unfold...it explodes onscreen, careening from one chest-thumping scene to the next. It delivers 85 minutes of pure action and hilarity, with minimal encumbrances (like exposition or character development) and with only skeletal fragments of plot. Crank also throttles forward with a glorious tongue-in-cheek approach - the over-the-top action is delivered with a side order of cheese, and plenty of humour accompanies the cocktail of testosterone and adrenaline (emphasis on "adrenaline"). The film is every bit as trashy, vulgar, sexist, brainless, excessive and callow as you'd imagine, but this reviewer enjoyed every delirious minute.
Former professional assassin Chev Chelios (Statham) awakens in his apartment at the beginning of the film after having been poisoned by his rival Verona (Cantillo) with a lethal dose of the "Beijing Cocktail". Chev only has about an hour to live, but learns that he'll be able to slow down the effects of poison and live long enough to exact revenge if he keeps his adrenaline levels high. And thus, Chev begins a citywide crime spree. In order to keep his adrenaline pumping he resorts to barbaric violence, cocaine, shootouts, car chases (usually in stolen cars), epinephrine, caffeinated drinks, nasal spray and a very public display of affection. And during all this chaos, Chev's "doctor" (Yoakam) - you'd use quotation marks too, if you saw how this guy runs his practise - dispenses advice through a phone line, though he insists there's no actual cure for what Chev has been injected with.
Directed and written by Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor, Crank is an exercise in overblown simplicity. Prior to this movie, Neveldine and Taylor had only worked as cinematographers and camera operators, which probably explains why the visuals overwhelm all narrative requirements. The story is every bit as dumb as it sounds, but who cares? Why watch Crank for incisive dialogue or intelligent plotting? It has a niche audience, and it aims solely to satiate them. Once you suspend your disbelief, respect the film's decision to dispose of all logic by the 10-minute mark, and realise that the creators are only interested in cramming as much action as possible into a tight runtime, you're in for a fun, action-packed ride that's all about the forward momentum.
Neveldine and Taylor employ every stylistic cinematic technique imaginable. In fact, there are times when the movie feels like little more than an opportunity for the two writer-directors to show off. With split screens, distorted images, first-person shots, slow-motion, fast-motion, freeze frames, animated representations of Chev's heart, colour saturation and use of Google maps, the look of the film is frenzied and adrenaline-pumping; replicating the emotions and anxieties of the protagonist. However the style crosses over into tedium from time to time due to sheer repetition. There's so much happening during every single frame and there's so much action that it all feels like a far too generous helping of junk food. After all, at its most basic level, Crank is overstylised junk food. If one removed all the visual tweaks and tongue-in-cheek humour from the equation, one would be left with a story better off in a direct-to-DVD action flick starring Van Damme or Steven Seagal.
British badass Jason Statham (of Transporter fame) carries the whole feature on his well-formed shoulders; pushing the envelope of acceptable antihero boundaries. With his eyes full of fire, Statham turns Chev Chelios into a laser-guided missile of mayhem, unable and unwilling to stop until he finds an antidote and/or slaughters everyone responsible for his corpse-bound state. Thankfully Statham brings a degree of dimension to the role, and his acting is top-notch. Since Crank is mostly a one-man show, the rest of the cast just needs to be present, accounted for, and playing their minor part for the film to succeed. But oddly enough, the supporting players are just as effective. Jose Pablo Cantillo is all teeth and terror as Verona, while Amy Smart is frequently amusing as Chev's girlfriend Eve. There's also Efren Ramirez (probably best known for Napoleon Dynamite) who plays Chev's sidekick Kaylo with subliminal flamboyance.
Some audiences may choose to dismiss Crank as an over-inflated excuse for blood, guts, firepower and fisticuffs...to an extent, that's correct. But it's also hilarious, irresistible, macho fun. It's best described as a live-action video game (some levels even play out like levels of Grand Theft Auto) with an unhinged Jason Statham in the centre of it all. Stuffy, serious critics may dislike Crank due to its contrived story (after all, why couldn't Verona just shoot Chev instead of poisoning him?) and shallow characterisations, but the movie is more geared towards those who'll take it in the intended spirit. Be sure to keep watching 'til the end credits expire for a scene which cements its live-action video game pedigree.
Followed by Crank: High Voltage in 2009.
7.5/10
