an overly extended intro

can i give this a "0"
awful awful movie.
when the title pops up you'll see it call this "part 1", which should immediately tell you that there is going to be scenes that are left in to fill time in order to cash in on a two part movie. however, nothing prepares you for 90% of the movie being filler. yeah, i said it because its true. for 90% of the movie there is no plot, there is nearly nothing happening, and we're treated to lame cinema work and the usual, for this series, bad acting...although this time with a strangely super digital filtered look but soap opera editing and drama. just think any "marriage special" from any soap opera ever...and you have it in a more grand but less substantial form here.

i was banging my head on a table. "is this going anywhere?" well, eventually in the last 15 or so minutes it turns into a movie with, like, a plot and stuff. no its not a good story...but if you endured it that long its at least something.

ah, the cherry on top of this one is this: i watched this with subtitles on, as i often do, and while the most profound moments(theoretically) of this overly long wedding diary are happening, during the wedding itself, the lyrics being sung go like this: "Have I found you Flightless bird, grounded, bleeding or lost you, American mouth. Big pill looming. Now I'm a fat house cat Nursing my sore blunt tongue. Watching the warm poison rats curl through the wide fence cracks Pissing on magazine photos" wtf? why? i don't even care about this movie and still thats just freakin' tasteless.

as jacob says when the writers can't explain something "whatever". carry on. time to fill still. oh yeah a bit of sex and baby drama. zzzz.

oh i can't f'n' wait till part 2!!! yea!!!! no i'm being honest...i want to see if they can pull off something worse than this.

dreadful. boring. trite. waste. skip it.
(1/10) yeah, give it a 1 for the last 15 minutes.

ps. it might seem strange that i have the wedding dress edition of this. hell i didn't want the movie at all let alone a wedding portrait on fabric one assume to hang somewhere...i didn't buy it, it was bought for me...the wedding dress edition was simply cheaper than all the other version when it was bought.








1/10