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"Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom" (2018)

FIRST IMPRESSIONS


When the island's dormant volcano begins roaring to life, Owen and Claire mount a campaign to rescue the remaining dinosaurs from this extinction-level event.

This review will be slightly longer than usual, because the Jurassic Park franchise is so special to me.

When I first saw Jurassic World, I thought it was merely an overwhelming disappointment after a fourteen-year wait – the biggest letdown of my entire life – but watching it again recently, I find it legitimately irritates me. Now that the sequel is out, I have to stop kidding myself. I hate the Jurassic World movies! I hate them!

All the same problems I have with its predecessor are still present here. The characters are just as annoying, and the CGI is every bit as unappealing. The dinosaurs don't look alive; I just feel like I'm watching a video game. Although, thankfully, there are more noticeable instances of practical effects. My favourite scene is when they're extracting the T-rex's blood, if only because it was really there in front of the camera.

But what makes this sequel so much more unbearable is the abundant, blatant stupidity. The premise is insipid and a full-on retread of The Lost World: environmentalism (misguided, if you ask me) versus capitalism. The villains are straight-up cartoonishly evil, and the characters make some monumentally idiotic decisions; the ending in particular is nothing short of rage-inducing.

It also bothers me how they keep claiming the Isla Nublar dinosaurs are the last of their kind. What the hell happened to Isla Sorna? A quote from The Lost World is directly referenced in this movie, so clearly Site B does exist.

There are a few blindingly obvious homages to the first movie, which are just plain embarrassing.

Sadly, my wish for feathered dinosaurs still wasn't granted. They'd better be a plot point in Jurassic World 3, otherwise I'm giving up on this series completely.

Long story short, I really didn't like this movie. I used to think Jurassic Park III was the worst of the bunch, but I'd even take that train wreck over this banal and uninspired waste!


My rating: 35%

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Added by MaxL
5 years ago on 15 June 2018 20:47

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