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The Transporter Refueled is at once wholly unrelated to the Jason Statham Transporter trilogy, and an attempt to continue the franchise as if nothing has changed. Indeed, this is a soft reboot of the Transporter series (without Statham) to whore out the brand name for all the money that it's worth, yet it isn't bold enough to try anything new, bringing back the same car, the same smart suit, the same lead character and the same type of visual style, except it's all executed on a slashed budget, and it's not even half as fun as its predecessors. (Hell, even Transporter 3 had its moments.) Suffering from a complete lack of logic and dismal acting, Refueled is a terrible new low for the series, and its technical presentation is about on the same level as a below-par straight-to-video endeavour. Trust me, it's bad.
In 1995, ruthless criminal Arkady (Radivoje Bukvic) takes over crime operations at the French Riviera, seeking to make a lot of money by exploiting women as high-price hookers. Fifteen years later, Anna (Loan Chabanol) looks to exact revenge on Arkady, teaming up with three of Arkady's former prostitutes to steal his fortune and rob his associates. Needing a driver, Anna calls upon Frank Martin (Ed Skrein) for the job, but although she initially agrees to his list of rules, she instantly changes the contract and forces Frank's involvement by kidnapping his father, Frank Sr. (Ray Stevenson).
For absolutely no good reason, The Transporter Refueled apparently takes place in 2010, with the story opening in 1995 before flashing forward fifteen years, according to an on-screen caption. But this doesn't make much sense, since the characters drive 2015 model vehicles and use iPhone 5's, leaving us to assume that either the prop department didn't get the memo, or the screenwriters were unable to handle basic math. Or nobody gave a shit. Worse, Refueled actually rips off scenes from the previous films, with Frank confronting a group of thugs in a car park who want to steal his ride, before proceeding to beat the snot out of them. And bringing in Frank's father only serves to rip off Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, with Frank Sr. calling his son "Junior." Dialogue is mostly awful, without any degree of wit, and the flick helps itself to piles of action movie clichés. But an even more pertinent issue is that Refueled is flat-out boring. It clocks in at a rather slender 96 minutes, yet it feels twice as long, with wonky pacing and humdrum action scenes that are spoiled by jarring editing.
Refueled was directed by Camille Delamarre, who has a history with Luc Besson's EuropaCorp production company; he directed Brick Mansions and edited both Transporter 3 and Taken 2. But none of these pictures are especially good, leaving us to wonder why he was the obvious choice for this outing. Surely Besson could have recruited a proper action director? It's almost as if he's sabotaging his own movies. Even though Refueled thankfully doesn't rely so much on shaky-cam, editing is a blur, ruining the car chases and fisticuffs, with Delamarre struggling to find a proper rhythm amid all the harsh, frenetic cuts. Admittedly, things do improve to an extent in the third act, finding a few inspired moments of over-the-top lunacy, including Frank using filing cabinet draws during a brawl, and a jump from an airport tarmac into the boarding gate. The Transporter series is predicated on this type of tongue-in-cheek insanity, but there's so little of it here, and Delamarre has no clue how to properly execute coherent, enjoyable set-pieces.
Skrein may not be Jason Statham, but he certainly wants to be. An Englishman much like his predecessor, Skrein espouses his best Statham growl impersonation (but it's still pretty bad), ostensibly even trying to mimic his walk at times, but it's all for naught. Whereas Statham exudes charisma and authority, Skrein is perhaps the least intimidating action hero wannabe of recent memory. The only real saving grace in the acting department is Stevenson, with the former Punisher showing that he still has what it takes. Honestly, this should have been Stevenson's show, since he's a far more agreeable movie badass. Hilariously, Stevenson is actually only three years older than Statham, and there's a mere nineteen-year age gap between Stevenson and Skrein. The rest of the actors aren't really worth mentioning, with forgettable foreign actors speaking broken English, and with no names ever sticking.
At the end of the day, The Transporter Refueled is a pointless reboot that nobody wanted or asked for, and it's so creatively bankrupt and unengaging that you will instantly forget it before the end credits have even expired. Hell, it's possible to forget the movie whilst watching it, as my mind certainly wandered, pondering more interesting things. With the Transporter TV series seemingly over, and with this pile of crap racking up an unimpressive figure at the worldwide box office, hopefully this is the end of the franchise.
4.1/10
