Words replaced with "dick"

Here's an excerpt from Harry Potter & the Prisoner of Azkaban. I replaced certain words with "dick". Please take time to enjoy and post your own "dickified" modifications!
The original
“So,” said Hagrid, rubbing his hands together and beaming around, “if yeh wan’ ter come a bit nearer…”
No one seemed to want to. Harry, Ron, and Hermione, however, approached the fence cautiously.
The edited
“So,” said Hagrid, rubbing his dick together and beaming around, “if yeh wan’ ter come a bit nearer…”
No one seemed to want to. Harry, Ron, and Hermione, however, approached the dick cautiously.
The original
“So,” said Hagrid, rubbing his hands together and beaming around, “if yeh wan’ ter come a bit nearer…”
No one seemed to want to. Harry, Ron, and Hermione, however, approached the fence cautiously.
The edited
“So,” said Hagrid, rubbing his dick together and beaming around, “if yeh wan’ ter come a bit nearer…”
No one seemed to want to. Harry, Ron, and Hermione, however, approached the dick cautiously.

Here's another for fans of Hermione:
Hermione was examining her new schedule.
Hermione was examining her new dick.
Hermione was examining her new schedule.
Hermione was examining her new dick.