Bad Boys Reviews

FIRST IMPRESSIONS

Bad Boys, to cut right to the point, is one of the worst movies I've ever seen in my life! Since this was Michael Bay's first movie, before everything got super-exaggerated, I thought maybe this might be even somewhat tolerable. But boy was I wrong!
You would not believe how many times I had to pause the movie for a minute and collect myself during the first half! There was literally something else to annoy me every five minutes! And that was even before the lie that dominates the storyline, where Marcus has to pretend he's Mike! The phone call scene, the fact that Marcus is so bad at lying that anyone with half a brain cell would immediately see right through him, that stupid scene with the photographs… God!
On top of that, I swear half the dialogue in this movie is yelling, which also drove me nuts! There's one point in particular where Mike is interrogating someone and Marcus is carrying on in the background, where I actually said out loud, "SHUT UP!"
As is typical of a Michael Bay movie, the performances are all flat as pancakes. Even Will Smith is boring!
Also, to prove my point how terrible Michael Bay is at action scenes, the last thing I should be during your final massive shootout is bored!
To sum it up, I've seldom been more annoyed by a movie. It's not funny, the characters are irritating, and it's all just insufferable yelling and chaos.

My rating: turkey

If you like explosions, shoddy dialogue and plenty of race-themed humor than it is likely that Michael Bay's Bad Boys is one of your favorite movies. If you like a sensible plot, well constructed action scenes and acting performances that rise above the level of a cereal commercial then my question is...why the hell are you watching a Michael Bay film?

Released in 1995 Bay's Bad Boys follows two detectives (played ably by Martin Lawrence and Will Smith) as they attempt to recover a bunch of drugs that disappeared from the evidence locker at their police station. Since that is, apparently, not enough impetus for an action-packed comedic farce Bay decides that suave talking ladies man Smith and whipped homebody Lawrence should switch roles halfway through the film (with Smith pretending to be Lawrence and vice-versa). It's a completely unreasonable setup, yes, but there is indeed the possibility of comedic gold here. Oh, and explosions. And car chases.

On the last two counts Bad Boys does indeed deliver. The plot is poorly paced and overly complicated with most of the nonsensical action packed into the tail end of the movie but it mostly looks good. Sure the next set piece is often obviously telegraphed (there can't be a shootout here...there's no explosive barrels!) but as long as the explosions are pulled off well who cares. Sometimes the sequences go on too long and it seems as if Bay is grasping at straws to increase the variety of objects that are exploded or crashed into and sometimes the quick cuts are frustrating and obscure more than they show but, for the most part, the action is competently done.

Sadly, despite what the commercials and flame-tinged promotional posters may make you believe this really only qualifies as half an action movie. The main chunk of the movie is devoted to the comedic, buddy cop interplay between Smith and Lawrence and the flimsily constructed premise that they must pretend to be each other in order to fool a state's witness (Tea Leoni is excruciating in this role). I'm not expecting Shakespeare (after all he wasn't very funny) but the humor here is mostly non-existent. There are moments of levity, like when Lawrence tries to explain the homo-erotic self-portraits of Smith that are hung in what Leoni assumes is Lawrence's apartment or when Smith and Lawrence engage in witty racially fueled banter with the Italians on the force but I generally found more humor in the idea that Lawrence must assume Smith's characteristics to fool a state's witness that knew neither of the cops prior to the proverbial drug deal gone bad.

Smith and Lawrence are mostly charming (except when they're ad-libbing) but, like a watch salesman hawking Drolexes, that charm can only carry the dialogue so far. Also if, God forbid they're forced to do a scene with any of the other actors in this movie, then you're better off simply fast-forwarding a few minutes. The central plot is non-sensical enough that you won't miss much.

Ultimately, Bad Boys is stuck in the purgatory of the action comedy world. It's action is sometimes entertaining but there's nothing here to show off that new 55 inch plasma you bought after remortgaging your house and the writing sometimes elicits a chuckle but there's nothing here that's belongs in the annals with the great buddy cop films of the past. It's like a second-rate Lethal Weapon for the ritalin generation - something you can put on the the background while working on spreadsheets or something. Sure that explosion will make you look up but don't worry - you didn't miss a thing.

Great music and a wonderful script.