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Added by youngbloods on 11 Feb 2013 03:33
3372 Views 17 Comments

Things I Detest In Cinema

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People who added this item 439 Average listal rating (207 ratings) 7.5 IMDB Rating 7.3
Art House

Urban Dictionary EPIC definition of "Art House":

A movie theater that generally shows films which are not considered main stream, often foreign or independent. They can often be identified by their self righteous clientele of movie snobs and alternative concessions items such as fine pastries and espresso (just in case the movie is really good). They are frequented by middle aged and old people under the recommendation of the local culture publication, in addition to hipsters, yuppies, goths, emo kids and any other branch of youth that adheres to a counter culture. The underlying implication here is that the low production values and unique storylines make for a rich movie going experience vastly superior to the packaged, stadium seated, blockbuster experience of major movie theaters. It is for this reason that these cinematic sanctuaries are distinguished as art houses. However the reality is that many of the films shown in these theaters have gotten little exposure for good reason...they suck. And these theaters serve the dual function of feeding the counter culturists' insatiable desire to wallow in all things independent and obscure while providing middle aged people with a non hostile alternative to the local megaplex.

It's true. "Art House" is just pretentious rubbish. The word 'art' has been abused for so many years now, the last thing that should be done is pseudo-intellectuals thinking they're far too superior to watch and enjoy a blockbuster or a Hollywood film, instead they'd rather watch a film that's not very well known and rave about it and say how marvellous it was. Agree with these sort of people, and you're as bad as they are. Art house should not exist, let's put it that way. As soon as it's gone: a part of cinematic life will be rejuvenated - yes that's how artsies write in their reviews, if you were wondering...


Now, here is a part from a review of this movie, that I think is brilliant, here is part of it.

They meet a magician, one of the Bronte sisters (who they set on fire), a pianist (during which the director treats us to another terrific and ingenious scene – the camera spinning in a circle for ten minutes) and some dustbin men who happen to be intensely educated on the current affairs of African politics.

If you would like to experience the rest of that marvellous review, the link is here.

Also seen in:
Godard films
Bergman films
Tarkovsky films
And anything that these two artsy fartsy users have rated high: artsy fartsy 1 and artsy fartsy 2
youngbloods's rating:
Watched Wanted Custom
People who added this item 1362 Average listal rating (716 ratings) 8.4 IMDB Rating 8.1
Irritating Movies

Ingmar Bergman - A director I have tried so very very hard to like, but after now watching four movies by him, I have not only NOT become a fan of his work, but I also now despise the man, his movies and his stupid hot Swedes and everything by and about him.

As I have said countless times, the man is too a wannabe, he's not unique or talented, he doesn't have anything, they guy's just stupid, they all are. It's sort of nostalgic times with Godard, Bergman twists his camera around here and there and that. The the most annoying bit in persona, close to the end, so I'd already pretty much made my mind up about what I thought of him. We had a very tedious and long conversation in which we could only see one persons face,... and you know what Bergman did that was 'oh so unique and masterful', he repeated the conversation all over again so we could see the other person's face. Wow, classy, defiantly unique and that. -.-

Anyway, as I have said, Bergman never won any Oscar for his work (failings), he may have been nominated a few times, but he was never Oscar worthy. When it comes down to it, nobody would dare admit that Bergman had nothing. But then again The Oscars don't mean everything, they're just a very small part in success, but even Bergman couldn't hit it correctly there. When most people (godawful "actors" and directors) can.

Also seen in:
The Seventh Seal
Wild Strawberries
Fanny and Alexander
The rest of Bergman's movies I don't intend on watching
youngbloods's rating:
Watched Wanted Custom
People who added this item 447 Average listal rating (140 ratings) 8.5 IMDB Rating 8.5
Long tedious movies made purely for the sake of either controversy or attention

I remember watching this film, I saw with a few friends, we've always wanted to try a really long film, quite a different viewing experience I believe, but this turned out to be ridiculous. It brings dull to all new levels, the fact that it doesn't really have and well balance plot or anything appealing of course didn't help in the slightest, I can't say much about this movie, as it's fairly unknown, yet it still manages to sneak its way into "Movie to see before you die", trust me, you'll be watching this movie till you die. Obviously the director was having a little competition with himself to see if he could make the longest movie ever made. Just because a movie is over 7 hours it doesn't make it appealing or good. If you're going to go to all that trouble at least make up for it, Y'know. Anyway, whether or not it manages to get on any "Movie you must see" lists, I doubt anyone is going to watch a 7 hour film, not the majority of people anyway. It must have been made to get attention, must've been. This is nothing more than artsy fartsy tripe...I'd avoid it.

Also seen in:
Lawrence of Arabia
The Ten Commandments
2001: A Space Odyssey
Watched Wanted Custom
Pretentious Movies

I think this movie is overhyped, overrated, tedious and pretentious bull crap. Definitely could have cut an hour of it, easily. If you want to know fully by what I mean just read my review. AND, how dare people call this "Sci-Fi" it's anything but, people!!
youngbloods's rating:
Watched Wanted Custom
People who added this item 873 Average listal rating (466 ratings) 6.6 IMDB Rating 6.9
Paedophilia in the movies

Yuck, it still remains a mystery to me how anyone would find this remotely interesting, it's f*cking disgusting, despite whether it's overly explicit or not. I think this is just utter trash for trashy minded people. If you find this sort of stuff entertainment I have a suggestion; turn yourself in to the police. You aren't safe to be walking around the streets, you basically need help and security. Also I'm not the type of person to shout "paedophile!" at someone for the sake off it, but this movie actually IS about paedophilia, so I have a right to confronts its ugliness. Even Kubricks one I have no time for, please note.

To even quote actress Natalie Portman on this movie:

"I don't think there needs to be a movie out where a child has sex with an adult."

"I think there's enough exploitation out there that it's not necessary to do more."

"Let me tell you, this movie's going to be sleaze."

Well she's absolutely right, shame on you moronic people who enjoyed this pap. Stuff like this is what makes Cinema vulgar and dreadful.

Also seen in:
The 1962 original
youngbloods's rating:
Watched Wanted Custom
Porn Disguised As Art

Just when I thought 'Lolita' was bad I was exposed to this abysmal mess of a movie. The amount of vulgarity in this movie is stupid and of course sad. I'm sick of people shouting "Art!" at something when it's not, whether it's on a canvas or a screen, it just sickens me. I think stuff like this is the very death of cinema as a whole, there's just not enough insults to call this film. This movie is shittier than what they were eating. I could throw a couple of buckets of paint onto a wall and call it art;
doesn't mean it truly is.

I'd also like to share some comments witch were put on a review calling it a Disturbing masterpiece of art.

'The true power of cinema'? Loads of naked non-actors lolloping around, while some aging dragon spouts bits of de Sade stories til we all feel asleep. De Sade doesn't film well, because it is not drama, it's verbiage. I am not commenting on the moral aspects of the film, take them as you find them, but let no one pretend this pile of steaming crap is in anyway cinematic.

And here's another;

anybody that thinks this is a masterpiece is dilusional, this is afilm made up from a sick mind and being allowed to get away with passing it off as art. it"s a aload of rubbish and it"s getting by with just a notorious reputation.the acting is just plain laughable it"s that bad,just another 70s cheap sex romp and an insult to peoples inteligence.

So on a last thing on this, that car, Y'know, that killed Pasolini, I want that car in a museum, naming it a plague stopper, as for the driver, well he/she, deserves a medal.
youngbloods's rating:
Watched Wanted Custom
Overhyped Movies

Oh, god, where do I start with this one, I think out of all the movies I have seen (well over a thousand), THIS has to be the most overrated movie I have ever seen. I'm quite a fan of Stanley Kubricks work, but this and '2001: A Space Odyssey' are defiantly his worst.

So, after watching this, I sat there for about 20 minutes and thought; "do I really find one of the most highly acclaimed movies of all time overrated!? *20 Mins went by*.. Yes!, I did, I found it a steaming pile of crap. Not only is it thoroughly overrated it's also very dated. If I were to say anything nice about this crap it would be that it was a movie of its time.

Also seen in:
Life of Brian
Citizen Kane
2001: A Space Odyssey
Gone with the Wind
Come and See
The Graduate
Lawrence of Arabia
Funny Games
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
The Birds
Porco Rosso
Taxi Driver

youngbloods's rating:
Watched Wanted Custom
People who added this item 1051 Average listal rating (592 ratings) 6.5 IMDB Rating 7.1
Homies and American Slang

Errh.. I'm sure that every time I watch a movie that features such things I'm sure I lose a brain cell, deservingly so, as I should already have the knowledge not to watch such crap. But, shit happens, and so I can safely say it's like a rap loser song made into a movie. How anyone can find this at all entertaining must be an idiot, honestly, terrible movie for terrible people. If I ever wanted to hear such appalling use of the English language I'd just pop done to the local youth centre. Why should I, or anyone else for that matter, have to put up with trash, now you're just shoving anything in to making a movie, what a disastrous shame.
youngbloods's rating:
Watched Wanted Custom
People who added this item 84 Average listal rating (42 ratings) 2 IMDB Rating 1.9
Bad Movies

OWWW!!!, yes, it burns!!!or hurts.. whatever!

There's alot more bad movies I know, so that's why I'll keep adding.
youngbloods's rating:
Watched Wanted Custom
People who added this item 4033 Average listal rating (2584 ratings) 6.6 IMDB Rating 7
chick flicks

Oh, just...death to all chick flicks, this and art house are both the evil side of cinema. Curse the fools who came up with this dumb idea, although, I guess they can't be that dumb, since the whole thing made a ton of money, damn it !! Anyone who's entertained in the slightest by crap such as this should be permanently banned from seeing anymore films.

Pretty Woman, I choose, specifically because it's ghastly stuff. Things like Love actually I can consider bearable, but this is just vulgar, along with the rest of the chick flicks. To save you, years and years of wasting your time with this crap. I'll be very generous and tell you what happens in every single one:

Two people fall in love
They get along fine
There is some kind of misunderstanding
They break up
They get back together
The end.
youngbloods's rating:
Watched Wanted Custom
People who added this item 4663 Average listal rating (2866 ratings) 8.2 IMDB Rating 8.3
Not all the 'classics' are good

Many films get called a 'classic', yet people seem to think that because something is considered a classic, it means it's good - WRONG! as I have personally encountered many films that are indeed classic's, and some of them happen to be on my worst film lists.

Speaking of crappy 'classic' films, oh looky what we have here!, Taxi Driver, ah, perfect example of an overrated classic. It's overrated, boring and pretentious. I knew beforehand many people I tend to agree with thought this film was boring, overrated and disappointing, but I had this sort of glimmer of hope - which was destroyed afterwards. This film is a tedious joke, it make 2001 look like it has something to offer. Well, actually, they can both rot in hell, for all I care.

People seem to act like they have some kind of disgusting disease if they don't like a classic, well, that's what the weak-minded think, honestly. I will not name too much here, but I hate a lot of classics, so, what my point is basically, just because a film is titled a 'classic' it doesn't mean it's good. Most films rarely deserve the praise they get, maybe you'll come to learn this in later years.
youngbloods's rating:
Watched Wanted Custom
Things I don't particularly care for in cinema.

A work in progress, I'll undoubtedly add more things when I think of them.

Oh, and of course, you mustn't whine about how I slam some of your favourite film or favourite people etc. you can't take everything WAY to seriously, but do know the ratings are dead real and so is pretty much everything else. The border between facts and opinion are slim, may I remind you.

Added to

6 votes
Favourite Lists: Originality (14 lists)
list by Veselnov
Published 6 years, 6 months ago

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