30 Reasons Not To Vote For Mitt "The Shit" Romney

Warren Buffett

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:09:45 GMT

HE'S TOO DAMN RICH

That's just not right. Motherfucker can't relate to the plight of normal people.

Oh ok PICK A HOUSE YOU BASTARD! Oh wait, you own ALL of them?

"There are 47 percent of the people who will vote for the president no matter what. All right, there are 47 percent who are with him, who are dependent upon government, who believe that they are victims, who believe the government has a responsibility to care for them, who believe that they are entitled to health care, to food, to housing, to you-name-it -- that that's an entitlement. And the government should give it to them. And they will vote for this president no matter what. ... These are people who pay no income tax. ... My job is not to worry about those people. I'll never convince them they should take personal responsibility and care for their lives."

Yup, tax the poor people but not rich people who can actually AFFORD to pay tax without going bankrupt! Nice idea bro!

The most prophetic misspelling of all time? More like the most horrifying.

Nicole 'Snooki' Polizzi

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:14:49 GMT

HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE SPRAY TAN

Or maybe he dyed his skin brown to relate to Hispanic people? Nice look pumpkin man!

"My dad, as you probably know, was the governor of Michigan and was the head of a car company. But he was born in Mexico... and had he been born of, uh, Mexican parents, I'd have a better shot at winning this. But he was unfortunately born to Americans living in Mexico. He lived there for a number of years. I mean, I say that jokingly, but it would be helpful to be Latino."

-Mitt Romney, in leaked comments from a Florida fundraiser, May 17 2012

Clancy Brown

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:17:42 GMT

HE IS EERILY SIMILAR TO MR KRABS

Scary, huh?

Harry Shearer

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:21:59 GMT

NOT TO MENTION MR BURNS

Release the hounds....

Ronald Reagan

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:26:17 GMT

His party logo looks like a guy's ass

Jon Stewart

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:28:19 GMT

NO ONE LIKES HIM

Ooooooooooooooooooh burnnn!!!

Sarah Palin

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:29:15 GMT

THIS HORRIFYING FACT

http://www.boyculture.com/.a/6a00d8341c2ca253ef017c32f8f688970b-800wi

And this too.

Paul Ryan

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:31:17 GMT

HE IS VEHEMENTLY ANTI GAY- BUT HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THIS?

Srsly Mitt gay marriage is OK you fucking idiot. And really, which dude do you want as VP? Joe "badass" Biden or Paul "retard" Ryan?

And of course, who won the debate?

Mitt Romney

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:34:07 GMT

DO I EVEN HAVE TO SAY ANYTHING?

Oh I don't know Mitt McTitty....maybe cuz if you opened an airplane window, you'd get sucked out and plummet to your goddamn death!!! Smooth. Do you want THIS GUY as a fucking president????

Barack Obama

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:38:12 GMT

BABIES HAVE A SIXTH SENSE

Lol look at that baby- she's all like Mitt gtfo go die.

Saddam Hussein

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:39:48 GMT

So many human rights violations and illegal shit

Dr. Seuss

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:40:40 GMT

He looks like the fucking mayor of whoville

Ann Romney

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:48:40 GMT

His wife looks like the bride of chucky

Big Dumb Face

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:49:47 GMT

Consider the terrifying symbolism

Bitch Alert

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 19:56:28 GMT

MITTENS WEARS MAGIC UNDERWEAR

"A garment worn by extremely devout followers of the the Mormon cult. It is basically a set of long underwear but the Mormons believe it protects them from evil."

So much lulz. But hey at least he got swag, right?

Clint Eastwood

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 17:32:06 GMT

HE MAKES CLINT EASTWOOD ACT STUPID

I mean c'mon Clint, you're such a badass but wtf is this shit?

Flip Wilson

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 17:35:30 GMT

HE IS A SERIAL FLIP FLOPPER

Just look for yourself:

http://mittromneyflipflops.com/

Snoop Dogg

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 17:39:31 GMT

He drove 12 hours with his dog tied onto the top of his car

David Lynch

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 17:45:05 GMT

DAVID LYNCH DOESN'T LIKE HIM

Yes, David fucking Eraserhead Blue Velvet Mulholland Drive Lynch detests the Romster! Don't let him get his mittens on your $.

Cher

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 17:47:58 GMT

NEITHER DOES CHER

http://i.imgur.com/r5CcG.jpg

She is the queen of the gays, people! She knows what LGBTS want!

Josh Hartnett

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 17:49:28 GMT

HIS SON JOSH IS A FUCKING SERIAL KILLER

Look, but don't look to close or he'll suck out your soul. Josh doesn't have time to blink. Blinking's for fools. I can just imagine his thoughts....

"Defeat Obama father. Decimate the democrats so we can rule once again."

Joseph Goebbels

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 17:53:45 GMT

DEMOCRATS COMPARED PAUL RYAN TO NAZI PROPAGANDA MINISTER JOSEPH GOEBBELS

Right here lol:

http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/politics/2012/09/calif-dem-says-ryan-lies-like-nazis-goebbels/

Then I guess *gasp* this means Romney is....das fuehrer Mittler!

People have even compared Paul Ryan's tax plan to the Nazi's last solution....except this time it's a holocaust of poor people :(

Fred Gwynne

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 17:59:51 GMT

Mitt and friends all look like the freakin' munsters

Mike Binder

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 18:03:13 GMT

HE KEEPS WOMEN IN BINDERS

Romney, during his debate with President Obama at Hofstra University in New York, recalled that when he assembled his Cabinet when he was governor of Massachusetts "we took a concerted effort to go out and find women who had backgrounds that could be qualified to become members of our Cabinet.

"I went to a number of women's groups and said, "Can you help us find folks," and they brought us whole binders full of women."

Yeah, okay Mitt, like you can just refer to women as if they were some sort of office items like staplers and pencils and pens and paper!

GOOD JOB MITT, now Bill's gonna cheat again! Oh wait actually Mitt can say whatever he wants to...

Well, Mitt how would you like it if we put YOU in a binder?

Wonder Woman (c)

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 18:09:22 GMT

SPEAKING OF DISRESPECT FOR WOMEN....

WTF? I wipe my ass with that load of bullshit!

Literally.

Gay Dad

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 18:18:24 GMT

HE BEAT UP A GAY KID IN HIGH SCHOOL

When Mittens was a young preppy douche, this happened:

BLOOMFIELD HILLS, Mich. — Mitt Romney returned from a three-week spring break in 1965 to resume his studies as a high school senior at the prestigious Cranbrook School. Back on the handsome campus, studded with Tudor brick buildings and manicured fields, he spotted something he thought did not belong at a school where the boys wore ties and carried briefcases. John Lauber, a soft-spoken new student one year behind Romney, was perpetually teased for his nonconformity and presumed homosexuality. Now he was walking around the all-boys school with bleached-blond hair that draped over one eye, and Romney wasn’t having it.

“He can’t look like that. That’s wrong. Just look at him!” an incensed Romney told Matthew Friedemann, his close friend in the Stevens Hall dorm, according to Friedemann’s recollection. Mitt, the teenage son of Michigan Gov. George Romney, kept complaining about Lauber’s look, Friedemann recalled.

A few days later, Friedemann entered Stevens Hall off the school’s collegiate quad to find Romney marching out of his own room ahead of a prep school posse shouting about their plan to cut Lauber’s hair. Friedemann followed them to a nearby room where they came upon Lauber, tackled him and pinned him to the ground. As Lauber, his eyes filling with tears, screamed for help, Romney repeatedly clipped his hair with a pair of scissors.

The incident was recalled similarly by five students, who gave their accounts independently of one another. Four of them — Friedemann, now a dentist; Phillip Maxwell, a lawyer; Thomas Buford, a retired prosecutor; and David Seed, a retired principal — spoke on the record. Another former student who witnessed the incident asked not to be identified. The men have differing political affiliations, although they mostly lean Democratic. Buford volunteered for Barack Obama’s campaign in 2008. Seed, a registered independent, has served as a Republican county chairman in Michigan. All of them said that politics in no way colored their recollections.

“It happened very quickly, and to this day it troubles me,” said Buford, the school’s wrestling champion, who said he joined Romney in restraining Lauber. Buford subsequently apologized to Lauber, who was “terrified,” he said. “What a senseless, stupid, idiotic thing to do.”

“It was a hack job,” recalled Maxwell, a childhood friend of Romney who was in the dorm room when the incident occurred. “It was vicious.”

“He was just easy pickin’s,” said Friedemann, then the student prefect, or student authority leader of Stevens Hall, expressing remorse about his failure to stop it.

The incident transpired in a flash, and Friedemann said Romney then led his cheering schoolmates back to his bay-windowed room in Stevens Hall.

Friedemann, guilt ridden, made a point of not talking about it with his friend and waited to see what form of discipline would befall Romney at the famously strict institution. Nothing happened.

That is fucking awful!

But wait- Mitt can't help it! He's a natural-born rebel!

Jim Henson

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 18:36:44 GMT

HE WANTS TO GET RID OF SESAME STREET AND BIG BIRD

"What things would I cut from spending? Well, first of all, I will eliminate all programs by this test, if they don't pass it: Is the program so critical it's worth borrowing money from China to pay for it? And if not, I'll get rid of it. Obamacare's on my list. ... I'm sorry, Jim, I'm going to stop the subsidy to PBS. I'm going to stop other things. I like PBS, I love Big Bird. Actually like you, too. But I'm not going to -- I'm not going to keep on spending money on things to borrow money from China to pay for. That's number one."

Big & Rich

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 18:54:45 GMT

HE'S A CORPORATE STOOGE FOR WALL STREET AND THE RICH 1%

"Corporations are people, my friend… of course they are. Everything corporations earn ultimately goes to the people. Where do you think it goes? Whose pockets? Whose pockets? People's pockets. Human beings, my friend."

But the scary thing is- dems are funded by these corporate fatcats too!! No politician is safe and incorruptible, them and their Super PAC bullshit, being bought and sold by evil rich pricks!

Mitt is definitely the bigger Wall Street whore though.

Christian Bale

Tue, 23 Oct 2012 01:30:50 GMT

HE IS PATRICK BATEMAN FROM AMERICAN PSYCHO LOL LOOK

Aww poor Newt :( Jk Newt is a fat raving moron so thank gosh. But the similarities are striking...

Maybe it's just the 80s executive hair!

Stephen Colbert

Thu, 18 Oct 2012 18:44:43 GMT

COLBERT TELLS IT LIKE IT IS

Because if y'all use your common sense, Romney doesn't have to destroy our world with his Republican insanity! In conclusion, I leave you a heart-stoppingly terrifying pic of Mittens in mom jeans.