Andrew Largeman: You know that point in your life when you realize that the house that you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? All of the sudden even though you have some place where you can put your stuff that idea of home is gone.
Sam: I still feel at home in my house.
Andrew Largeman: You'll see when you move out it just sort of happens one day one day and it's just gone. And you can never get it back. It's like you get homesick for a place that doesn't exist. I mean it's like this rite of passage, you know. You won't have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for you kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I miss the idea of it. Maybe that's all family really is. A group of people who miss the same imaginary place.
That's life. If nothing else, its life. It's real, and sometimes it fuckin' hurts, but it's sort of all we have. –Sam
This is your one opportunity to do something that no one has ever done before and that no one will copy throughout human existence. And if nothing else, you will be remembered as the one guy who ever did this. This one thing. –Sam
I'm okay with being unimpressive. I sleep better. –Mark
If you can't laugh at yourself, life is going to seem a whole lot longer than you'd like. –Sam
Samantha: If you don't fall in love, you can't get hurt.
Roberta: But it sure is lonely all by yourself.
Vietnam Veteran: I'm going to tell you something i wish someone would have told me when I was your age.
Chrissy: Oh yeah? What's that?
Vietnam Veteran: Your parents aren't always right.
Samantha: No shit.
It's normal for things to be shitty. –Teeny
As we grow older, it becomes difficult to just believe. It's not that we don't want to, but too much has happened and we can't. –Samantha
Things will happen in your life that you can't stop. But that's no reason to shut out the world. –Crazy Pete
The only true currency in this bankrupt world... is what you share with someone else when you're uncool. –Lester Bangs
I always tell the girls, never take it seriously, if ya never take it seriously, ya never get hurt, ya never get hurt, ya always have fun, and if you ever get lonely, just got to the record store and visit your friends. –Penny Lane
Never take it seriously, you never get hurt. Never get hurt, you can always have fun. And if you ever get lonely, you just go to the record store and visit all your friends. –Penny Lane
Adolescence is a marketing ploy. –Elaine Miller
Oh man, you made friends with 'em. See, friendship is the booze they feed you. They want you to get drunk on feeling like you belong. –Lester Bangs
Look at this: an entire generation of Cinderellas and no glass slipper. –Elaine Miller
This one is something a friend of mine said to me. "You have to believe that life is more than the sum of its parts, kiddo." I remember it right now to the "kiddo" part. But when I think about what she said, the same thing always comes into my head. What if you can't put the pieces together in the first place? –Leland
You want a why. Well, maybe there isn't one. Maybe... Maybe this is just something that happened. –Leland
I think there are two ways you can see the world. You either see the sadness that's behind everything or you choose to keep it all out. –Leland
Never lie, steal, cheat, or drink. But if you must lie, lie in the arms of the one you love. If you must steal, steal away from bad company. If you must cheat, cheat death. And if you must drink, drink in the moments that take your breath away. –Hitch
Relationships are for people who are waiting for something better to come along. –Sara
So how does it happen, great love? Nobody knows... but what I can tell you is that it happens in the blink of an eye. One moment you're enjoying your life, and the next you're wondering how you ever lived without them. –Hitch
Derek Zoolander: I'm pretty sure there's a lot more to life than being really, really good looking. And I plan on finding out what that is.
Mugatu: Let me show you Derelicte. It is a fashion, a way of life inspired by the very homeless, the vagrants, the crack whores that make this wonderful city so unique.
Mugatu: Who cares about Derek Zoolander anyway? The man has only one look for Christ's sake! Blue Steel? Ferrari? Le Tigra? They're the same face! Doesn't anybody notice this? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!
Mugatu: Hansel, he's so hot right now, Hansel.
Mugatu: I give you, "The Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good."
[Derek looks at the model for a moment, then throws it on the floor]
Derek Zoolander: What is this? A center for ants? How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read if they can't even fit inside the building?
Derek Zoolander: I’m gonna answer your question with another question; how many Abediginals do you see modeling?
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Shake and bake!
Ricky Bobby: What does that do? Does that blow your mind? That just happened!
Jean Girard: Is that a catchphrase or epilepsy?
Ricky Bobby, Cal Naughton, Jr.: Shake and bake!
Ricky Bobby: How was school today, boys?
Walker: I threw a bunch of Grandpa Chip's war medals off the bridge.
[Chip is starled]
Ricky Bobby: Sounds like a good day. How 'bout you, TR?
Texas Ranger: The teacher asked me what was the capital of North Carolina. I said Washington, D.C.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: Bingo.
Ricky Bobby: Nice.
Texas Ranger: She said "No, you're wrong." I said "You got a lumpy butt." She got mad at me and yelled at me and I pissed in my pants and I never did change my pee-pants all day. I'm still sittin' in my dirty pee-pants.
Cal Naughton, Jr.: I wet my bed until I was nineteen. There's no shame in that.
Ricky Bobby: Dear Lord baby Jesus, lyin' there in your ghost manger, just lookin' at your Baby Einstein developmental videos, learnin' 'bout shapes and colors. I would like to thank you for bringin' me and my mama together, and also that my kids no longer sound like retarded gang-bangers.
Texas Ranger: Old man, I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey!
Ricky Bobby: Dear 8 pounds 6 ounces... new born infant Jesus,don't even know a word yet.
Ron Burgundy: I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly...
Frank Vitchard: I am gonna straight-up murder your ass.
Ron Burgundy: What? You pooped in the refrigerator? And you ate the whole... wheel of cheese? How'd you do that? Heck, I'm not even mad; that's amazing. How 'bout we get you in your p.j.'s and we hit the hay.
Ron Burgundy: I don't know how to put this but I'm kind of a big deal.
Veronica Corningstone: Really.
Ron Burgundy: People know me.
Veronica Corningstone: Well, I'm very happy for you.
Ron Burgundy: I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.
Ron Burgundy: I'm in a glass case of emotion.
Ron Burgundy: You stay classy, San Diego. I'm Ron Burgundy?
Ed Harken: Dammit. Who typed a question mark on the Teleprompter?
Ron Burgundy: The only way to bag a classy lady is to give her two tickets to the gun show...
[kisses his biceps]
Ron Burgundy: and see if she likes the goods.
Brick Tamland: I'm Brick Tamland. People seem to like me because I am polite and I am rarely late. I like to eat ice cream and I really enjoy a nice pair of slacks. Years later, a doctor will tell me that I have an I.Q. of 48 and am what some people call mentally retarded.
Bill Lawson: [voiceover] Brick Tamland is married with 11 children and is one of the top political advisors to the Bush White House.
Brick Tamland: I love... carpet.
Brick Tamland: I love... desk.
Ron Burgundy: Brick, are you just looking at things in the office and saying that you love them?
Brick Tamland: I love lamp.
Ron Burgundy: Do you really love the lamp, or are you just saying it because you saw it?
Brick Tamland: I love lamp. I love lamp.
Alright, let me be the first to say congratulations to then. You get one vagina for the rest of your life. Real smart Frank. Way to work it through. –Beanie
Mitch: I've had a hell of a day and even worse week. And all I want to do is get some fucking sleep.
Beanie: Whoa. Whoa. Why the F-ing? Why in front of the kid? All ya gotta do is say "earmuffs" to him, and you can say "F***, s***, b****."
Frank: Cock. Balls.
Beanie: I'm just trying to make a point, Frank. You don't have to celebrate it.
Young Patches O'Houlihan: Dodgeball is a sport of violence, exclusion, and degradation.
Patches O'Houlihan: [giving the pre-match pep talk] And will someone catch a goddamn ball? It's like watching a bunch of retards trying to hump a doorknob out there!
White Goodman: Here at Globo Gym we're better than you, and we know it.
Cotton McKnight: It's time to separate the wheat from the chaff, the men from the boys, the awkwardly feminine from the possibly Canadian.
White Goodman: At Globo Gym we understand that "ugliness" and "fatness" are genetic disorders, much like baldness or necrophilia, and it's only your fault if you don't hate yourself enough to do something about it.
Jeremy Grey: Tattoo on the lower back? Might as well be a bullseye.
Jeremy Grey: How many times you gonna do this shit? Rule #32: You don't commit to a relative unless you're absolutely positive they have a pulse.
John Beckwith: Rule #16: Give me an up-to-date family tree. That was your mistake. You made me look like an idiot.
Jeremy Grey: Rule #76: No excuses. Play like a champion!
Jeremy Grey: I got to get outta here, pronto. I got a stage five clinger. Stage five, virgin, clinger.
I'm thinking about taking that new chick from Logistics. If things go right I might be showing her my O-face. You know: Oh. Oh. –Drew
Peter Gibbons: You see Bob, it's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care.
Samir: No one in this country can ever pronounce my name right. It's not that hard: Samir Na-gheen-an-a-jar. Nagheenanajar.
Michael Bolton: Yeah, well at least your name isn't Michael Bolton.
Samir: You know there's nothing wrong with that name.
Michael Bolton: There was nothing wrong with it... until I was about 12 years old and that no-talent ass clown became famous and started winning Grammys.
Samir: Hmm... well why don't you just go by Mike instead of Michael?
Michael Bolton: No way. Why should I change? He's the one who sucks.
Samir: No, not again. I... why does it say paper jam when there is no paper jam? I swear to God, one of these days, I just kick this piece of shit out the window.
Michael Bolton: If we get caught, we're not going to white-collar resort prison. No, no, no. We're going to federal POUND ME IN THE ASS prison.
Peter Gibbons: I can't believe what a bunch of nerds we are. We're looking up "money laundering" in the dictionary.
Peter Gibbons: Let me ask you something. When you come in on Monday, and you're not feelin' real well, does anyone ever say to you, 'Sounds like someone has a case of the Mondays'?
Lawrence: No. No, man. Shit, no, man. I believe you'd get your ass kicked sayin' something like that, man.
Dom Portwood: Yeah. It's just that we're putting new coversheets on all the TPS reports *before* they go out now. So if you could just remember to do that from now on, that'd be great. All right!
Terrible idea... Don't you just love those? –Katherine
Every day I watch for the old man with the flowers, and I wonder, was he born here? Did he love someone here? Did he lose someone here? He doesn't seem as curious about me, but that's alright. –Frances
What are four walls, anyway? They are what they contain. The house protects the dreamer. Unthinkably good things can happen, even late in the game. It's such a surprise. –Frances
Regrets are a waste of time. They're the past crippling you in the present. –Katherine
Never lose your childish innocence. It's the most important thing. –Katherine
Hilary Faye: Mary, turn away from Satan. Jesus, he loves you.
Mary: You don't know the first thing about love.
Hilary Faye: [throws a Bible at Mary] I am FILLED with Christ's love! You are just jealous of my success in the Lord.
Mary: [Mary holds up the Bible] This is not a weapon! You idiot.
Pastor Skip: Alright! Alright! Who's down with G-O-D?
Cassandra: There's only one reason Christian girls comes down to the Planned Parenthood.
Roland: She's planting a pipe bomb?
Cassandra: Okay, two reasons.
Cassandra: So I figured they would have sent you to a special school by now.
Roland: [smirks] This IS a special school.
It's not about what happened in the past, or what you think might happen in the future. It's about the ride, for Christ's sake. There is no point in going through all this crap, if you are not going to enjoy the ride. And you know what... when you least expect something great might come along. Something better then you even planned for. –Irving Feffer
Reuben Feffer: Since we have been together I have felt more uncomfortable, out of place, embarassed, and just physically sick then I have in my entire life. But I could not have gone through that, I could not have thrown up 19 times in 48 days if I was not in love with you.
Reuben Feffer: Oh and by the way, I threw away all your little throw pillows. Yea. Cuz throw pillows suck. They serve no purpose. They're purely decorative.
Reuben Feffer: No Lisa, I'm not going to take you back
Lisa Kramer: [stunned] What, why?
Reuben Feffer: Well, you screwed a SCUBA instructor on our honeymoon. What kinda cold-hearted bitch will do that to someone they love. I have to be an idiot to take you back.
Yeah. Yeah, sexy, huh? How 'bout this for a number? Six. That's how old my other daughter is, eight is the age of my son, two is how many times I've been married - and divorced; sixteen is the number of dollars I have in my bank account. 850-3943. That's my phone number, and with all the numbers I gave you, I'm guessing zero is the number of times you're gonna call it. –Erin
Theresa Dallavale: Okay, look, I think we got off on the wrong foot here...
Erin Brockovich: That's all you got, lady. Two wrong feet and fucking ugly shoes.
Ed Masry: What makes you think you can just walk in there and take whatever you want?
Erin Brockovich: They're called boobs, Ed.
All you need is for one person to think you're cool, and you're in. Everyone else will be scared to question it. –Rob Gellar
That thing, that moment, when you kiss someone and everything around becomes hazy and the only thing in focus is you and this person and you realize that that person is the only person that you're supposed to kiss for the rest of your life, and for one moment you get this amazing gift and you want to laugh and you want to cry because you feel so lucky that you found it and so scared that that it will go away all at the same time. –Josie Gellar
Dear Leonard, To look life in the face, always, to look life in the face, and to know it for what it is. At last to know it, to love it, for what it is, and then, to put it away. Leonard, always the years between us, always the years, always the love, always... the hours... –Virginia Woolf
What does it mean to regret when you have no choice? It's what you can bear. And there it is... It was death. I chose life. –Laura Brown
Someone has to die Leonard, in order that the rest of us should value life more. –Virginia Woolf
I'm like cat here, a no-name slob. We belong to nobody, and nobody belongs to us. We don't even belong to each other. –Holly Golightly
Holly Golightly: Well, when I get it the only thing that does any good is to jump in a cab and go to Tiffany's. Calms me down right away. The quietness and the proud look of it; nothing very bad could happen to you there. If I could find a real-life place that'd make me feel like Tiffany's, then - then I'd buy some furniture and give the cat a name!
My father died when I was thirteen and I inherited this money. Did you ever think that everyday I wake up, that I wish I could give it back, that I would give it back in a second, if it meant I could have one more day with him? But I can't. And that's my life and I deal with it. –Skylar
You're afraid of me! You're afraid that I won't love you back! Fuck it, I wanna give it a shot! At least I'm honest with you. –Skylar
Real loss is only possible when you love something more than you love yourself. –Sean
Look, you're my best friend, so don't take this the wrong way. In twenty years, if you're still livin' here, comin' over to my house to watch the Patriots games, still workin' construction, I'll fuckin' kill you. That's not a threat. Now, that's a fact. I'll fuckin' kill you. –Chuckie
And why does he hang out with those retarted gorillas, as you called them, because any one of them, if he asked them to, would take a fucking bat to your head, okay? It's called loyalty. –Sean
You're not perfect sport, and let me save you the suspense, this girl you've met she's not perfect either. But the question is whether or not you're perfect for each other. –Sean
People call those imperfections, but no, that's the good stuff. –Sean
Have you ever confused a dream with life? Or stolen something when you have the cash? Have you ever been blue? Or thought your train moving while sitting still? Maybe I was just crazy. Maybe it was the 60's. Or maybe I was just a girl... interrupted. –Susanna
I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside. –Susanna
How am I supposed to recover when I don't even understand my disease? –Susanna
No one cares if you die, Lisa, because you're dead already. Your heart is cold. That's why you keep coming back here. You're not free. You need this place to feel alive. It's pathetic. –Susanna
If I could have any job in the world, I’d be a professional Cinderella. –Lisa
When you don't want to feel... death can seem like a dream. But, seeing death - really seeing it... makes dreaming about it fucking ridiculous. –Susanna
Why do you hate me so much? How could you tell the only person in the world that I love, that I care about so much, to stay away from me? Do you think that the only thing I'll ever do to someone is screw them up? That I'm not worth loving? –Nicole
You can be anywhere where when your life begins. You meet the right person and anything is possible. –Nicole
There are millions of people in this world. But in the end, it all comes down to one. –Nicole
You can be anywhere when your life begins. When the future opens up in front of you. And you may not even realize it at first, but it's already happening. –Nicole
I'm designed to feel slightly dissatisfied! –Jesse
Memories are wonderful things, if you don't have to deal with the past. –Celine
Maybe what I'm saying is, is the world might be evolving the way a person evolves. Right? Like, I mean, me for example. Am I getting worse? Am I improving? I don't know. When I was younger, I was healthier, but I was, uh, whacked with insecurity, you know? Now I'm older and my problems are deeper, but I'm more equipped to handle them. –Jesse
Life's hard. It's supposed to be. If we didn't suffer, we'd never learn anything. –Jesse
I feel like if someone where to touch me, I'd dissolve into molecules. –Jesse
They enjoy the goal but not the process. But the reality of it is that the true work of improving things is in the little achievements of the day. –Celine
I see it in the people that do the real work, and what's sad in a way is that the people that are the most giving, hardworking, and capable of making this world better, usually don't have the ego and ambition to be a leader. –Celine
You can never replace anyone because everyone is made up of such beautiful specific details. –Celine
If there's any kind of magic in this world, it must be in the attempt of understanding someone, sharing something. I know, it's almost impossible to succeed, but... who cares, really? The answer must be in the attempt. –Celine
I know happy couples... but I think they lie to each other! –Jesse
I used to think that if none of your family or friends knew you were dead, it was like not really being dead. People can invent the best and the worst for you. –Celine
I like to feel his eyes on me when I look away. –Celine
You know, I have this awful paranoid thought that feminism was mostly invented by men so that they could like, fool around a little more. –Celine
Isn't everything we do in life a way to be loved a little more? –Celine
It will be the most passionate, intimate experience you've ever had. I declare now, I will give my life for you. And if you fail to come to me, I know some part of me will surely die. –Matthew
As they say, she's nice from a far, but far from nice. –Rod
Men have this anti-intimacy force field around them. It is powered by sarcasm, humor, and aversion. –Matthew
Isn't American cheese appropriately named? It's fake and processed, just like America. –Matthew
There's a certain way a man stares at a woman he loves. The man looks like a boy on his birthday. And he treats the woman as if she were a gift that he's wanted so long to open and now he can't wait to see what the treasure is inside. –Patty
There are no clearly defined rules between men and women. So, each side thinks they're playing fair and each side thinks they're being cheated. Maybe, this is why men and women have the innate ability to bring out the poison in one another. –Matthew
Your company. The pleasure of your company. I want your input on video rentals. I stand there for hours, I can't pick anything out. I want someone to say goodnight to, a last call of the day. I don't have a last call of the day. Do you? –Buddy Amaral
Bouncing. It's like crashing except you get to do it over and over again. –Abby
It's not brave if you're not scared. –Abby
Look, guys screw up - that's what they do. It's in their manual, right under "Love your grill; leave socks on floor." -Donna
Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. But we think you're crazy to make an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us... In the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain... and an athlete… and a basket case… and a princess… and a criminal… Does that answer your question? Sincerely, the Breakfast Club
Screws just fall out all the time, the world is an imperfect place. –Bender
If you give off signals that you don't want to belong, people will make sure that you don't. –Principal
You said you couldn't be with someone who didn't believe in you. Well I believed in you. I just didn't believe in me. I love you. always. –Blane
I just want them to know that they didn't break me. –Andie
We don't have none of this stuff in the boy's room! Wait a minute! We don't got none of this... we don't got doors on the stalls in the boy's room, we don't have, what is this? What's this? We don't have a candy machine in the boy's room! –Duckie
If somebody doesn't believe in me, I can't believe in them. –Andie