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Added by Stehako on 5 Aug 2009 04:37
17225 Views 18 Comments

Luckiest Talentless SOBs - & the Women They Kissed

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Natalie Portman - Attack of the Clones/Revenge of the Sith

Sienna Miller - Factory Girl

Awake - Jessica Alba

Mischa Barton - Virgin Territory

Rachel Bilson - Jumper

Stehako's rating:
Average listal rating (505 ratings) 7.2 IMDB Rating 0
Reese Witherspoon - Pleasantville

Jordana Brewster - The Fast and the Furious

Jessica Alba - Into the Blue

Vera Farmiga - Running Scared

Penelope Cruz - Noel

Olivia Wilde - The Death and Life of Bobby Z

Piper Perabo - The Lazarus Project

Stehako's rating:
Jenna Elfman - Edtv

Jennifer Lopez - The Wedding Planner

Kate Hudson - How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days/Fool's Gold

Kate Beckinsale - Tiptoes

Sahara - Penelope Cruz

Jaime King - Two for the Money

Carly Pope - Two for the Money

Kimberly Williams - We Are Marshall

Jennifer Garner - Ghosts of Girlfriends Past

Stehako's rating:
Kirsten Dunst - Virgin Suicides

Kate Beckinsale - Pearl Harbor

Julia Stiles - O

Rose Byrne - Wicker Park

Diane Kruger - Wicker Park

Marley Shelton - Sin City

Scarlett Johansson - The Black Dahlia

Naomie Harris - August

Stehako's rating:
Brittany Daniel - Basketball Diaries

Reese Witherspoon - Fear

Heather Graham - Boogie Nights

China Chow - The Big Hit

Jennifer Aniston - Rock Star

Thandie Newton - The Truth About Charlie

Charlize Theron - The Italian Job

Elizabeth Banks - Invincible

Kate Mara - Shooter

Zooey Deschanel - The Happening

Olga Kurylenko - Max Payne

Stehako's rating:
Average listal rating (1651 ratings) 6.8 IMDB Rating 0
Bridget Fonda - It Could Happen to You

Elisabeth Shue - Leaving Las Vegas

Vanessa Marcil - The Rock

Monica Potter - Con Air

Gina Gershon - Face/Off

Meg Ryan - City of Angels

Carla Gugino - Snake Eyes

Angelina Jolie - Gone in 60 Seconds

Tea Leoni - The Family Man

Penelope Cruz - Captain Corelli's Mandolin

Diane Kruger - Matchstick Men/National Treasure

Maria Bello - World Trade Center

Eva Mendes - Ghost Rider

Jessica Biel - Next

Rose Byrne - Knowing

Eva Mendes - The Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call - New Orleans

Monica Bellucci - The Sorcerer's Apprentice

Stehako's rating:
Average listal rating (1807 ratings) 6.9 IMDB Rating 0
Monica Bellucci - Dracula

Winona Ryder - Dracula

Sandra Bullock - Speed

Aitana Sanchez-Gijon - A Walk in the Clouds

Rachel Weisz - Chain Reaction

Cameron Diaz - Feeling Minnesota

Charlize Theron - The Devil's Advocate & Sweet November

Carrie-Anne Moss - The Matrix Trilogy

Brooke Langton - The Replacements

Marisa Tomei - The Watcher

Diane Lane - Hardball

Stehako's rating:
Keira Knightley - Pirates of the Caribbean Trilogy

Diane Kruger - Troy

Nathalie Cox - Kingdom of Heaven

Kirsten Dunst - Elizabethtown

Christina Ricci - New York, I Love You

Riley Keough - The Good Doctor
Stehako's rating:
Average listal rating (317 ratings) 6.4 IMDB Rating 0
Kelly Lynch - Drugstore Cowboy

Sean Young - A Kiss Before Dying

Bridget Fonda - Singles

Annabella Sciorra - Mr. Wonderful

Nicole Kidman - To Die For

Denise Richards - Wild Things

Cameron Diaz - There's Something About Mary

Natasha McElhone - City of Ghosts

Christina Applegate - Employee of the Month

Marisa Tomei - Factotum

Kate Hudson - You Me and Dupree

Stehako's rating:
Liv Tyler - Inventing the Abbots

Kate Winslet - Quills

Bryce Dallas Howard - The Village

Jacinda Barret - Ladder 49

Reese Witherspoon - Walk the Line

Eva Mendes - We Own the Night

Jennifer Connelly - Reservation Road

Vinessa Shaw - Two Lovers

Gwyneth Paltrow - Two Lovers

Stehako's rating:


Actors who must have this in their contract clause:

Don't expect me to act and the film must contain a kissing/sex scene with a beautiful woman. Thanks, bro.

These guys seem like they could actually be cool in real life, sans Hayden Christensen; but damn it, they are terrible actors! And look at these women they've been able to get close with! Sure, they're mostly professional/awkward kisses, but lucky SOBs nonetheless.

Congratulations to Penelope Cruz and Reese Witherspoon for showing up 3 times on the list. You must be attracted to poor talent.


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Posted: 9 years, 1 month ago at Aug 26 22:19
Fuck. I would like to be a talentless SOB for a while. Or a year.
Posted: 9 years, 1 month ago at Aug 27 4:19
Joaquin Phoenix is horrible, anything he's done since Gladiator has made me want to shoot myself (And I'm a pretty happy person), even Walk the Line wasn't as great of a performance as everyone says - Reese kicked his ass!
And Paul Walker... well, there is absolutely no reason why he should ever be employed as an actor, he's got great looks but as soon as he opens his mouth I want to, too - but because I need to barf.
And I certainly agree with all the other choices, even as a lady myself I have to agree these talentless jack-asses are way too lucky with the ladies, nice work!
Posted: 8 years, 1 month ago at Aug 5 12:34
Josh Hartnett also kised Lucy Liu in Lucky number Slevin and Shannyn Sossamon in 40 days and 40 nights.
Posted: 8 years, 1 month ago at Aug 9 19:13
How lucky are those girls who kissed Josh Hartnett? Very damn lucky!
Posted: 8 years, 1 month ago at Aug 9 21:12
This is one of the best lists I've come across! Nice work, Stehako!
All of these dudes are lucky as hell to have been able to share romantic scenes with the ladies listed.
The only entry that I even slightly remotely think may have gotten a bum rap is Hartnett, but he's the only one I'll vouch for. I mean, he's certainly no Brando or Welles, but seeing him on screen doesn't make me "barf" like ErinneXes with Paul Walker above! LOL!!
Posted: 7 years, 1 month ago at Aug 23 2:37
That's actually true... and unfair
Posted: 7 years, 1 month ago at Aug 23 5:29
Yeah.Really SOB.

I wish I could be an actor just for kissing pretty girls(*3*)
Posted: 7 years, 1 month ago at Aug 23 5:31
BTW,Keanu Reeves isn't SOB.

Instead,I think those girls who were kissed were lucky.
Posted: 6 years, 6 months ago at Mar 14 18:12
^ He still got to snuggle with Monica Bellucci (in 2 movies), and that tipped the scales drastically for me. Besides, he's talentless.
Posted: 6 years, 4 months ago at May 1 19:38
nice list! innovative
Posted: 6 years, 3 months ago at Jun 1 11:46
5 6 7 8 9 10 : Are not rubbish actors...................
Posted: 6 years, 3 months ago at Jun 1 11:53
You have to add Adam Sandler
Posted: 6 years, 3 months ago at Jun 1 13:03
if it was about talentless girls who kissed the hottest boys ever,kristen stewart would be #1 !
Posted: 6 years, 3 months ago at Jun 1 15:14
i would kiss any of these guys (except Nicholas Cage and Keanu Reeves)

But excellent list :]
Posted: 4 years, 2 months ago at Jul 3 0:36
Interesting list. I wouldn't necessarily call all of them talentless.
The one that really gets me is Mark Wahlberg and Zooey Deschanel. That talentless, narcissist ass clown and the most super-desirable star in Hollywood? (Sigh.) Just another thing that makes me lose faith in humanity.
Posted: 3 years, 10 months ago at Nov 29 9:20
Inspiring and innovative list...I clearly agree with all these remarks, excluding some roles of this guys (Joachim Phoenix in Gladiator is the preety role of him), but rest of this list is really good in my opinion. Bye ;-)

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