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List added by Exclusive_Henrik on 23 April 2009 11:17
50 Funniest Movies i Have Seen. |
Views : 1070 Comments : 3
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 1141  7.7  8  Pete: It's four in the fucking morning! Shaun: It's Saturday! Pete: No, it's not. It's fucking Sunday. And I've got to go to fucking work in four fucking hours 'cos every other fucker in my fucking department is fucking ill! Now can you see why I'm SO FUCKING ANGRY? Ed: Fuck, yeah! Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
 
369 6.8 7.4  Surfing Instructor: There's only one cure for pain like that. Peter Bretter: What? Surfing Instructor: Weed. Ya got any? Peter Bretter: No. Surfing Instructor: Well then let's just go surfing! Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
838 7.4 8  Dante Hicks: What time d'you get to work today? Randal Graves: Like... ten, or ten after. Dante Hicks: You were over a half an hour late! And then all you do is come in here! Randal Graves: Yeah, to talk to you. Dante Hicks: Which means the video store is ostensibly closed. Randal Graves: Oh, it's not like I'm miles away! Dante Hicks: Unless you're out renting video at other video stores! Randal Graves: Hermaphrodites! I rented it so we could watch it together. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
340 6.8 7.2  Red: Why don't you follow his lead and just chill out, man? Dale Denton: I'm chill. I'm chill as a cucumber, man. Red: You don't seem chill. Dale Denton: I'm more chill than you. Red: You're more chill than me? Dale Denton: Yeah. Red: Look what I'm wearing. Kimono, dog. What're you wearing? Dale Denton: A suit. Red: Yeah, exactly. I don't know what's up with you, but I don't know if I like you. Dale Denton: Well, I don't know if I like you either, man. Red: Well, that's your loss 'cause I'm a great friend. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
396 7.5 8.1  Ken: Coming up? Ray: What's up there? Ken: The view. Ray: The view of what? The view of down here? I can see that down here. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
181 6.9 7.6  Trent: So, what'd you think of that Dorothy girl? Mike: The whole Judy Garland thing kinda turned me on. Does that make me some kind of a fag? Trent: No, baby, you're money. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
845 7.6 8  Danny Butterman: What's it like being stabbed? Nicholas Angel: It was the single most painful experience of my life Danny Butterman: [nodding] What's the second most painful? Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
583 6.7 7.2  Kirk Lazarus: Action Jackson can't cry, that's what's going down. Tugg Speedman: You know what Kirk, I'm ready to do the scene! Kirk Lazarus: What scene? The scene is about emotionality. Where is it? Now it's time to flip the script! We'll get to Chinese New Year waitin' for my man to cry. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
1475 6 7.1  Harry: So you got fired again, eh? Lloyd: Oh yeah. They always freak out when you leave the scene of an accident, you know? Harry: Yeah, well, I lost my job too. Lloyd: Man, you are one pathetic loser. No offense. Harry: No, none taken. You know what really chaps my ass though? I spent my life savings turning my van into a dog. The alarm alone cost me two hundred. Lloyd: Hey, chicks love it. It's a shaggin' wagon. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
1372 6.8 7.5  Cal: Oh, man, I had a weekend. Andy Stitzer: Yeah? Cal: We went to Tijuana, Mexico, you know? And we thought it would be fun, you know, to go to a show. Everybody says you gotta check out one of these shows. And... it's a woman fuckin' a horse. We get there and we think it's gonna be awesome and... it is not as cool as it sounds like it's gonna be. It's kinda gross. Andy Stitzer: Yeah. Cal: You think "A woman fuckin' a horse" and you get there and... it's a woman fucking a horse. Andy Stitzer: Yeah. Cal: It was really giving it to her. And you know what? To be honest I just felt bad for her, we all just felt bad for her. Andy Stitzer: Yeah. Cal: I kinda felt bad for the horse! Andy Stitzer: Wow, that's something Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
1428 8.1 8.5  King Arthur: Old woman. Dennis: Man. King Arthur: Man, sorry. What knight lives in that castle over there? Dennis: I'm 37. King Arthur: What? Dennis: I'm 37. I'm not old. King Arthur: Well I can't just call you "man". Dennis: Well you could say "Dennis". King Arthur: I didn't know you were called Dennis. Dennis: Well you didn't bother to find out did you? King Arthur: I did say sorry about the "old woman", but from behind you looked... Dennis: What I object to is you automatically treat me like an inferior. King Arthur: Well I am king. Dennis: Oh, king eh? Very nice. And how'd you get that, eh? By exploiting the workers. By hanging on to outdated imperialist dogma which perpetuates the economic and social differences in our society. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
1176 7 7.6  Todd Flanders: I wish Homer was my father. Ned Flanders: ...and I wish you didn't have the devil's curly hair. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
766 6.8 7.5  Alison Scott: I'm pregnant. Ben Stone: Fuck off! Alison Scott: What? Ben Stone: What? Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
715 7.1 7.8  Mindy: Look, kay? He assaulted the customer, grabbed the cash and ran out. Officer Slater: So, how how, how... Officer Michaels: Say when, height wise... Officer Slater: I'm gonna start up here. Officer Michaels: I'm gonna start from the buttom... Mindy: Whatever 5'10 is, he was 5'10. Officer Slater: E-ethnicly, I mean, did, what, uhhm. I mean, wa-was he, like u-us or... Mindy: A woman? A female, is that what you're asking? Officer Slater: No, I would say... Officer Michaels: Was he... Officer Slater: Was he African? Mindy: Was he African? No, he was American. And he was like you. He looked just like you. Officer Michaels: He was Jewish! An odd crime for a Jew to commit. Ok, so we have an African Jew wearing a hoodie... Mindy: No. You don't. No, that's not what I said. Is that what you heard me say? I said he looked like you. Do you look like an African Jew? Officer Michaels: No, I look like a cop. Mindy: He was caucasian. Officer Michaels: Caucasian... Officer Slater: Oh... Mindy: Kinda looked like Eminem. Officer Michaels: Ah, an M&M... Officer Slater: M&M, so he was like circular... Mindy: Marshall Mathers. Eminem, the rapper, Eminem. Officer Michaels: He looked like this? I'm a amateur. Officer Slater: 'Cause that kinda looks like an M&M. Officer Michaels: Longer face? Bigger nose? Would you say his mouth was wider? Open? A gap? Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
775 6.5 7  Ron Burgundy: Boy, that escalated quickly... I mean, that really got out of hand fast. Champ Kind: It jumped up a notch. Ron Burgundy: It did, didn't it? Brick Tamland: Yeah, I stabbed a man in the heart. Ron Burgundy: I saw that. Brick killed a guy. Did you throw a trident? Brick Tamland: Yeah, there were horses, and a man on fire, and I killed a guy with a trident. Ron Burgundy: Brick, I've been meaning to talk to you about that. You should find yourself a safehouse or a relative close by. Lay low for a while, because you're probably wanted for murder. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
587 7 7.7  Elias: Since God created man, and man created the Transformers, the Transformers are like a gift from God, Randal! Randal Graves: No sir. They are not a gift from God. They are an unholy curse from the beast we call the Desolate One. Elias: I don't really want to hear this Randal. Randal Graves: The First of the Fallen. The Spoiler of Virgins, the Master of Abortions! Elias: You know I don't like to talk about dark forces Randal. Randal Graves: [singing into P.A. microphone] Let me help you out of your chair, Grandma! Jay: [climbing through the drive-thru window] Grandma what was it like? To be on a holiday sight? Randal Graves: Late that night I awoke from my sleep. Jay: Hearing! Unknown! Voices! Randal Graves, Jay: Laughing insane! Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
1164 6.1 6.4  Matilda: I became... Hansel: What? Matilda: Bulimic. Derek Zoolander: You can read minds? Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
1176 6.7 7.6  Borat: [while driving] Look, there is a woman in a car! Can we follow her and maybe make a sexy time with her? Driving Instructor: No, no, no, no, no, no! Borat: A-why not? Driving Instructor: Because a woman has the right to choose who she has sex with. Borat: [stunned] WHAT...? You joke? Driving Instructor: It must be consensual. How 'bout that? Borat: [turns to Instructor, pauses] Ahahahahaha! Driving Instructor: That's good, huh? Borat: [pause] Is not good for me. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
326 7.4 8  Alan Garner: Did you have to park so close? Doug Billings: Yeah, what's wrong? Alan Garner: I shouldn't be here. Doug Billings: Why is that, Alan? Alan Garner: I'm not supposed to be within two hundred feet of a school... or a Chuck E. Cheese. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
447 6.3 7.2  Harold: Neil, you wouldn't happen to know how to get on the highway from here, would you? Neil Patrick Harris: Dude, I don't even know where the fuck I am right now. I was at this party earlier tonight and some guy hooked me up with this incredible "X" - next thing I know I'm being thrown out of a moving car. I've been trippin' balls ever since. Kumar: That's crazy, dude. We've been having a pretty crazy, night, too. We've just been driving around looking for White Castle but we keep getting sidetracked. Neil Patrick Harris: Yeah, dude, you fascinate me. Forget White Castle, let's go get some pussy! Harold: Huh? Neil Patrick Harris: It's a fucking sausage fest in here, bros. Let's get some poontang, THEN we'll go to White Castle. Kumar: No, Neil, you don't understand. We've been craving these burgers all night. Neil Patrick Harris: Yeah, I've been craving burgers, too. Furburgers. Come on, dudes, let's pick up some trim at a strip club. The Doogie line always works on strippers. [sings] Neil Patrick Harris: Lapdance... Kumar: [pause] There's a gas station. I'm gonaa see if I can get some directions. Neil Patrick Harris: You don't need dir- gah! Hurry up, dudes, hurry up! I'm losing wood. [they park, pause] Neil Patrick Harris: Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry... Kumar: Look, chill. Harold: We'll be right back, Neil. [they exit the car] Harold: Dude, what is the deal with Neil Patrick Harris? Why is he so horny? Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
 
1154 7.8 8.2  Avi: Tony. Bullet Tooth Tony: What? Avi: Look in the dog. Bullet Tooth Tony: What do you mean "look in the dog?" Avi: I mean open him up. Bullet Tooth Tony: It's not as if it's a tin of baked beans! What do you mean "open him up"? Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
437 7.1 7.5  Parole Board chairman: They've got a name for people like you H.I. That name is called "recidivism." Parole Board member: Repeat offender! Parole Board chairman: Not a pretty name, is it H.I.? H.I.: No, sir. That's one bonehead name, but that ain't me any more. Parole Board chairman: You're not just telling us what we want to hear? H.I.: No, sir, no way. Parole Board member: 'Cause we just want to hear the truth. H.I.: Well, then I guess I am telling you what you want to hear. Parole Board chairman: Boy, didn't we just tell you not to do that? H.I.: Yes, sir. Parole Board chairman: Okay, then. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
346 6.6 7.1  Brandon: Hello Miriam. Miriam Linky: Beat it, we're talking. Zack Brown: I just wanted to introduce you to Brandon. Brandon: Salutations. Zack Brown: Bobby's boyfriend. Miriam Linky: Bobby who? Bobby Long: Bobby me. Zack Brown: Brandon, uh, is the star as such adult fare as, what was that one called again? Brandon: "You better shut your mouth or I'm gonna fuck it." Zack Brown: That's right. I'm surprised I forgot that. Miriam Linky: Are you fucking with me? Zack Brown: [amused] No, they're fucking with each other. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
215 6.7 7.2  Danny: Pick us up in two hours. Ronnie: Fuck you, Miss Daisy. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
2278 6.2 6.6  [after being shot] Mask: Hold me closer, Ed, it's getting dark. [cough, cough] Mask: Tell Auntie Em to let Old Yeller out. [cough cough] Mask: Tell Tiny Tim I won't be coming home this Christmas [cough, cough] Mask: Tell Scarlett I do give a damn. [coughs in Orlando's face] Mask: Pardon me. [he dies, the Peanut Gallery appears and applauds while The Mask is handed an acting award] Mask: Thank you, you love me, you really love me! Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
1721 6.5 7.2  Hitchhiker: You heard of this thing, the 8-Minute Abs? Ted: Yeah, sure, 8-Minute Abs. Yeah, the excercise video. Hitchhiker: Yeah, this is going to blow that right out of the water. Listen to this: 7... Minute... Abs. Ted: Right. Yes. OK, all right. I see where you're going. Hitchhiker: Think about it. You walk into a video store, you see 8-Minute Abs sittin' there, there's 7-Minute Abs right beside it. Which one are you gonna pick, man? Ted: I would go for the 7. Hitchhiker: Bingo, man, bingo. 7-Minute Abs. And we guarantee just as good a workout as the 8-minute folk. Ted: You guarantee it? That's - how do you do that? Hitchhiker: If you're not happy with the first 7 minutes, we're gonna send you the extra minute free. You see? That's it. That's our motto. That's where we're comin' from. That's from "A" to "B". Ted: That's right. That's - that's good. That's good. Unless, of course, somebody comes up with 6-Minute Abs. Then you're in trouble, huh? [Hitchhiker convulses] Hitchhiker: No! No, no, not 6! I said 7. Nobody's comin' up with 6. Who works out in 6 minutes? You won't even get your heart goin, not even a mouse on a wheel. Ted: That - good point. Hitchhiker: 7's the key number here. Think about it. 7-Elevens. 7 dwarves. 7, man, that's the number. 7 chipmunks twirlin' on a branch, eatin' lots of sunflowers on my uncle's ranch. You know that old children's tale from the sea. It's like you're dreamin' about Gorgonzola cheese when it's clearly Brie time, baby. Step into my office. Ted: Why? Hitchhiker: 'Cause you're fuckin' fired! Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
466 6 6.4  Ricky Bobby: I will not shake your hand, but I will give you this [kisses Jean Girard] Jean Girard: You taste of America. Ricky Bobby: Thank you. Exclusive_Henrik's rating:
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